A Screenwriter's Life.

1. Any success is almost entirely in the hands of others.
2. You have more of a chance of being struck by lightning then selling a script.
3. Family thinks you're wasting your life, and you agree half the time.
4. Letting an individual read your script results in that person being the only one, including you, to see an obscure movie that is very similar to your script, and was made in 1952.
5. When writers block hits, you hate your very existence. When you are flying through pages, you hate your writing.
6. You go to a bar to collect your thoughts when the barkeep starts talking to a waitress about being in his "A robot witnesses a murder..."movie which is in pre-pro., and she accepts.
7. You realize that the big break you thought you were getting isn't all that important to your slow moving agent.
8. You read contest winning scripts and realize you could have won had you entered. You enter the next year and don't finish in the top 50%.
9. You move to L.A. half hoping an earthquake will take you down on the first day, ending your misery.
10. You know more about guns than a Montana militia.
11. You know what 'The Green Fairy" is, and it sounds appealing.
12. You have 6 scripts sitting in Act II, but you start a new one.
13. You get notes on a script which says, "Make it scarier". It is a comedy.
14. Another note reads " Great script, but we already have a Tooth Fairy goes on a rampage because someone stole her stash of gold teeth. PASS"
15. You request a brochure from the Chubb Institute 3 times a year.