All Your Search Belong To Us

including this google search: best sawzall for fucking

Yep, I guess my many posts on sawzall fucking have pushed me up the ranks with google.

Inland Empire

I just watched (finally) David Lynch's latest and I have to say it blew me away. Even better than Mulholland Drive. Laura Dern was amazing. the music was pitch perfect, and the cinematography was as good as it gets. Imagine The Lost Highway intertwined with Mulholland Drive, and a dash of Eraserhead, running just one minute under three hours. It's as scary as it sounds. And as brilliant. Seriously, this is as scared as I've been during a film in years. This is psychological horror at its best. There are at least 10-15 different scenes that had me either jumping out of my chair, or feeling as if I was about to do so at any moment.

I cannot recommend this movie enough.

"Death has come to your little town, Sheriff"

I would be the sheriff. The town would be Maple Shade, NJ. As soon as I moved back from Florida to pursue my intentions of directing my own film, Generator, I was hit with death. My grandfather was deathly ill and passed away shortly thereafter(I believe I mentioned this in one of my last blog updates). During the following months, I wasn't making much headway with my film project for a variety of reasons. Expecting people to work for free is naive at best, disaster at worst. My experience falls right in the center of the two. Despite laying all of the groundwork for the film, I hadn't been hands on with people enough. Meaning I didn't really explain the finer details to them. Such as which scene we'd be shooting upon the first night. And after I did, I didn't follow up and make sure they were ready, I just assumed it. That's when lack of money began to rear it's f'n face. My girlfriend/roomate upped and left about a year ago, leaving me with the full rent of which I of course cannot afford without forgoing just about everything else, film included. I get out of the lease this February. And that will get me back on track, I think. But anyway, one meandering month after another passed and I still hadn't gotten anything filmed. While this was going on, my father passed away. To make a long story short, I hadn't seen him in 16 years, but it was shock to the system anyway for many reasons I won't get into now. So a few more months go by, and my grandmother turns out to be very ill. Within months, she is bed ridden in the hospital and I'm making a decision to take her off the ventilator (she never wanted it anyway). She died the next morning peacefully. (A couple of weeks ago just before Christmas)

So here I am, almost two years back and nothing to show for it. To make matters worse, I completely neglected my writing since I was in producing/directing mode. And now, as I try to ease back into it, I am at a total loss as to how to proceed. There's just nothing there. Great ideas, sure. But shit, everyone has great ideas. Then I remembered this little blog I used to rant on, one that started because of the same exact thing- a lack of direction, motivation and some pretty hefty writer's block. It's not called the constipated writer because I was a writing machine when I started this, right? And to my surprise, it is still here. I'm quite sure nobody is linked up with me anymore, but that's okay. I get to write without really realizing it, and perhaps that will spur me on to my projects.

Which are:
1. Spec script of The Office for the Nickelodeon fellowship.
2. Death by Dating-dark comedy feature length script
3. Wombies-dark comedy-feature length script

So there you have it. A harrowing journey just like I always expected it to be. However, the good thing is I still have the location. I still have the actors. And I still have the ambition to make Generator. And I think I will.

Shut. Up.

The production meeting went well...as well as I could expect when the room is full of long time friends. We discussed possible scheduling issues, the importance of continuity(a word which nobody could pronounce for some reason), contracts, releases, table reads, walk throughs, grooming and wardrobe.

Next meeting is going to be the 25th on location so the fools can see what they're in for.

One of the people at the meeting was being ...not so supportive. At least that's the feeling I got. I always get the same feeling with this person no matter what we're doing. It seems this person feels in competition with me, though I have no idea why. This person shall remain nameless until he/she cops up to being jealous, or I fire he/she.

Why volunteer for a movie if you don't want to support me? Who f'n knows?! //////////

The horror site I write reviews for has gone to blog format...which means it's not a website anymore. They say it's to get more exposure, I say that's horseshit. I applied for a reviewing job with another well known site that takes it's craft seriously. It's not a horror site, but it's cool nonetheless.//////////

It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia is hilarious. Catch it on FX whenever the hell it's on. I think Sundays, or Thursdays. I enjoy seeing the city on tv and recognizing all of the areas. It's a shame more films aren't made in Philly. The city should be right up there with Chicago, but I think more films come out of the windy city. That's how it appears anyway. I might shoot a scene or two there just for the fuck of it./////////

When did Mtv become this annoying? The Hills, My Sweet Sixteen, Yo Momma and Cribs. Better known as how to infuriate yourself if you're over 25 years old. We wonder what's wrong with the world, and there it is in full glory. Anyone who watches those shows is a masochist, and anyone who enjoys them thinks they're going to be in position to be 'famous' by telling mom jokes from 1985. No lie, I heard one guy tell the old 'Your momma is like 7 eleven, she's always open". Wha????? I told that joke. In, no exaggeration, 1980. The spectators are the worst, covering their mouth because they have to hold in their hyena like cackling.

How do I know all of this if it's so horrifying? My girlfriend watches some of the shows, and now it's like a goddamn car accident. I have to see how bad it can get. But still, I've only caught bits and pieces of a few of the shows, and it's enough to deem Mtv hell in a hand basket.

The first official production meeting for Generator

...is to take place on July 7th, with a rain date of the 14th. I'll be sure to update more frequently from then on, maybe with some pics of the motley crew. Right now I'm searching for paperwork for the cast and crew to sign...in blood.

On another note, I entered the FX channel "It's always sunny in Philadelphia" contest. Little did I know almost all of the 20 selected semifinalists entered trailers, and not a comedy short, or an entire scene from an existing show they made prior. LAME. You mean to tell me you reward people for splicing together a trailer from existing material rather than actually taking a story, making it cohesive enough to make sense in the 5 minutes allotted and actually delivering a full, albeit narrative? I have to call bullshit on that one. Stupid me, I thought the idea was to show an idea for a pilot in short form and that the idea could translate into a series. I took the entire 'series' part of the equation very seriously, and thought my idea would work for at least 5 years, or 101 episodes. My idea was entitled 101 Debacles, and each week, I would show one of those debacles in all of it's glory. Most of them are from my life, or things I tend to think about all my life. Could have been great! (just like my life, coincidentally enough) But anyway, here's the first episode if interested. Keep in mind I had exactly 48 hours to film, edit and submit this. Debacle #1: The Myth of the Powdered Nose

Check back for all Generator, all the time beginning the weekend of the 7th.

Hi, My Name Is, Hi

A little update to the 3 people who continue to check my blog-I think I have found a special FX guy for Generator. He just graduated from the Tom Savini FX school, which is exactly what I was looking for....exactly. The reason? He'll be looking to take a job to make a name for himself, and he'll work for credit, just like everyone involved in the movie. He's a couple of hours away, but said he can make it work. We're going to meet up next week to have a sit down and go over the script.

Just about everything is lining up for the film to kick ass.

By the way, anyone who thinks Yo Momma is funny, or any of that other garbage on Mtv, should be drawn and quartered immediately. The decline of civilization can happen very quickly, apparently.