The Constipated Writer

Scre4m (2011)

2011-04-16T15:43:00.002-04:00

Is it possible for a film to be post postmodern and so self aware of the fact that its earlier installments are so self aware, it becomes a new creation?

Read more at Suite101: Scre4m (2011) http://www.suite101.com/content/scre4m-2011-a366305#ixzz1JiWKYLwg

Write Club Part II

2011-04-06T14:34:00.000-04:00

This weekend is a big one in terms of my screenwriting progress. I have gained some interest in a script I wrote a few months ago and have been asked to send my next draft to him/them. I went over it last week, changing some scenes around and cutting out some exposition to slim down the entire screenplay from 103 pages to 99 pages. This weekend, in extreme isolation, I will work on a full draft revision with major overhauls in hopes of having my next draft ready in about 7-10 days from now.

And of course, this is the part of screenwriting I hate..which kind of means I'm not really a screenwriter, right? I don't do well with analyzing...anything. I'm too scatterbrained and dare I say, creative minded for that. Ah, but one can learn to be analytical to some extent, so I won't use that entire left vs right brain argument. Time to exorcise all inborn excuses and get to work.

Time to shit or get off the pot, really.

Insidious (2011) A Review

2011-04-05T20:59:00.002-04:00

Insidious is a BANG! film that BOOM! does a decent SCREAM! job unnerving SLAM! you through constant SCREECH! use of loud ROAR! jump scares.... END CREDITS!

Read more at Suite101: Insidious (2011) http://www.suite101.com/content/insidious-2011-a364081#ixzz1IhU35mGS

Devil (2010) -Review

2011-03-19T16:14:00.002-04:00

Here's a twist- a M. Night Shyamalan movie that doesn't feel like it's 3 hours long!

Read more at Suite101: Devil (2010) http://www.suite101.com/content/devil-2010-a360094#ixzz1H4vA2j4T

My Soul to Take (2010)- Review

2011-03-14T11:31:00.000-04:00

A serial killer, the “the Riverton ripper”, swore to return and slay the seven children born on the night he died. Now 16 years later, someone is chasing down those children, but is it the ripper? The seven, as their known, will find out, even if they appear as disinterested as the audience.

Read more at Suite101: My Soul to Take (2010) http://www.suite101.com/content/my-soul-to-take-2010-a358031#ixzz1GaXH7g2t

Shock Waves (1977)

2011-03-10T17:06:00.000-05:00

There are plenty of films that have grand ideas which aren't fully formulated, and for that reason, they result in disappointment. Rarely has there been a better example of this in the horror genre than with Shock Waves.

Read more at Suite101: Shock Waves (1977) http://www.suite101.com/content/shock-waves-1977-a356557#ixzz1GEkXORhP

Waiting for the Sun is Done!

2011-03-09T17:52:00.001-05:00

And thankfully, it seems to retain the humor I originally intended it to. The problem is sometimes I begin a screenplay with this busting at the seams burst of idea energies, only to use my analytical skills to dampen it down. This time, I went wild with my imagination, sketching out the possible path of scenes in outline form. I chose the best one and placed it into the script. This worked for a few reasons, one being the outline helps me from aimlessly wandering around for 5 or 10 pages, and two, by doing this, it's almost like doing a partial rewrite on the fly. And third, this allowed me to focus in on the humor of the situations within each scene, instead of the overall screenplay.

By doing this, I feel it's consistently funnier than anything I've written. Sure, I had screenplays that were hysterical in spots, those spots I deemed needed to be so. There were too many peaks and valleys. But with this one, I have definite peaks of humor, and the dips never bog down so far as to be unfunny.

Now to sit back and let it stew for a couple of weeks...then tear it up again.

All Your Links Belong To...You

2011-03-01T18:22:00.000-05:00

Since I was gone so long I knew many of the links I posted to other blogs, those which i considered cool reads, would probably be outdated upon my return. Sure enough, the first five links I clicked were dead, so I just decided to delete them and start over. If you're still out there, and would like to trade links, throw me a line.

Chances are I'll probably end up adding you back anyway...my tastes haven't changed all that much.

Isolation, and its intense relation to creativity

2011-02-24T10:38:00.002-05:00

It's funny, blogging would be one of the first hobbies I would cut off if I truly wanted to be a pro screenwriter. (In fact, I did cut it out, judging by my last post date) It's usually a meandering exercise, done so that I don't have to dive into my real work, aka my screenplay. However, I've come to find that there are many other practices that cut into my creative juices.

1) The stinking' internet. I find myself searching under the guise of researching, hours at a time. Now, it's necessary to cut myself off from the internet in order to concentrate on the task at hand. Seriously, the internet is a true time sucking vampire which wraps you in like a casino. You never know what time it is, or just how much time you've been in here, and the time flies accordingly.

2) Video games. There's no getting around this, as much as I want to make excuses. I noticed I played Fallout 3 and Fallout New Vegas a total of 120 hours in about 2 years. I'm quite certain I could have been banging out drafts of many a screenplay in that time. And lets not forget, that's just two games out of about 30 that I own. Red Dead Redemption-25 hours, Mass Effect 2-15 hours ...as you see, this is a major time sucker.

3) Television. Although tv comes in third, it certainly creates enough attention deficit disorder to be on the list. I probably only watch 3 current shows on TV, however it's the reruns of favs, like Seinfeld, that really zone me out. They offer me cold comfort, and I ...you know...vegetate.

4) Android. My rooted Nexus One is my new laptop. I'm constantly manipulating its screen for quick bursts of entertainment. I'm usually on the go when this happens, so it probably doesn't cut into my writing too much. But the availability of internet through my phone is counter productive to my whacking out the internet with purposes of writing. So the phone (and rooted Nook Color) have to be put away under lock and key (like Dokken).

5) People. We all have responsibilities, and with those responsibilities come people. Family, friends, enemies-doesn't matter. They all cause our personality to shift, and any shift is one away from the creative process.

I recently went away for one day, to a house on the beach. Mid winter. No tv, no internet and almost no radio due to really bad reception. No people at the house, and the town was just about empty. I wrote 30 pages in about 6 hours on a script I was having major trouble with. I came home the next day feeling good about myself, renewed in a sense. In the 2 weeks since? 10 pages. Of shit.

So now, to the detriment of my mashed potato brain, I will schedule total media blackouts. I will utilize headphones with my ipod if there's any outside disturbances. Usually will listen to Brian Eno, or late 70's Bowie as I write. But that's it. The project begins today.

Of course, the mere fact that I'm blogging right now should tell you all you need to know about my state of mind.

Time to go!

D.I.Y. Boom Mic

2009-02-11T00:22:00.004-05:00

What year is this?

2009-01-31T22:11:00.004-05:00

Somehow I woke up in the new year writing and directing my own tv series (no not for NBC, for myself). After all that I laid out last year, all the goals, all the dreams and the line by line...outline, how did I end up here?

I don't know, but it just goes to show you have to keep your options open and only a fool like myself would try and create a year long schedule. Mostly what I realized is that I hate work. Like, real work. You know, like those jobs that are dropping like flies at the moment? So I'm happy to report the scripts I had set up on the right hand side of the page are all done. I wrote and rewrote them. That is all I accomplished from last years list. But really, that's all I truly cared about.

Oh, and if by chance you haven't seen The Nines ( written and directed by John August) you should go and buy the dvd. Really interesting movie, and Melissa McCarthy made me fall in love with her.

**Oh yes, my move to L.A. is on hold. However I did take a trip there in August and loved everything about it. I have no doubt that living there is the correct choice for me. But my wallet and I have some issues currently so maybe at a later date I'll be there.

This Just In:

2008-02-06T19:53:00.000-05:00

If you're speaking to someone, anyone, and the word "faux" seeps from your lips at any point, you are a huge friggin' douchebag.

That is all.

A Pint Or Two

2008-02-05T19:16:00.000-05:00

I have found a new haunt, and it's the same as the old hunt. I frequent a dive bar about a mile from my apartment. I have been going there for about 12 years with the mates, but it wasn't until recently I have discovered the cure for my block/procrastination. I get out of work at 2pm, so that leaves me plenty of time to get in an hour or two of writing. Unfortunately so deep is my procrastination, I find almost anything else to do once home. Internet, tv, games, reading...you name it. Well, I changed my routine. I stop at this little hole in the wall directly from work with my trusty laptop. I order a pitcher or two, or if my bank account is feeling rather endowed, I order up a Guinness and a shot of JD. And then...I type my screenplay. With no problems. If I hit a spot that derails me, I people watch. I listen to conversations. I order another shot. And it passes. Using this method, I have been rather prolific for the past nine days. I'm not ready to update the progress bars yet because it's kind of like chasing the dragon for me. But I have made significant progress with each project.

But yes, this has worked pretty well, and listening to people talk to each other in a pub does wonders. Try it sometime.

Your Film is Filthy...But May I Suggest A Porn?

2008-01-30T15:26:00.000-05:00

I absolutely love when justice is served.

The operator of the Utah-based Flix Club, which, as part of the Clean Flix chain, drew fire from major studios for removing scenes depicting sex and violence from home videos, has been arrested in Orem, Utah on charges of having sex with underaged girls. According to Orem police, Daniel Thompson also told the girls that his business was actually a cover for a pornography studio and asked them to participate in making a porn movie. The police report also said that they uncovered a "large quantity" of pornography at Thompson's business. According to the Salt Lake Tribune, Thompson told the arresting officers that he was unaware that the girls were not of legal age and that the porn movies were for his "personal use." Thompson previously operated the Clean Flix franchise in Orem but shut it down last month after giving away 400 sanitized versions of Disney's Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End. The studios, he said at the time, had told him that "if I don't shut down, they would break me."

It's A Weather Balloon

2008-01-23T21:09:00.001-05:00

You know, sometimes I tire myself out with conspiracy theories. They're like an addiction. Sometimes I need to reign myself back in before I go all Martin Lawrence down Main street.

However, our government and military still have not figured out how to deal with these events. Case in point: On January 8th, Texas residents saw something flying at about 300 feet, and it was a mile long and half a mile wide, and made no noise. The lights changed formation. It was being chased by fighter jets. The first reaction from the military? no F-16s or other aircraft from his base were in the area the night of Jan. 8, when most people reported the sighting. Officials at the region's two Air Force bases — Dyess in Abilene and Sheppard in Wichita Falls — also said none of their aircraft were in the area.

Cut to today: Although officials at the Naval Air Station Reserve Base in Fort Worth initially said none of their planes were in the area of the UFO reports, they changed their story Wednesday, saying that 10 F-16 fighter jets built by Lockheed Martin Corp. were training near Stephenville, about 70 miles (112 kilometers) southwest of Fort Worth, about the time of the sightings.

*Oh really now? Two weeks later you suddenly find this info?

Lol...

Look, I have no idea what it was that those Texans saw, but something tells me it was either a top secret military flying base, or it was something even they have no clue about. Either way, their excuse stinks.

How is it possible to be just as clueless as in the 1940's? What exactly do they think would happen if they said, "We have no clue what you saw"?

Just another aggravation of mine.

Bad Language To Bad Writing Spiral

2008-01-22T16:50:00.000-05:00

As I type away, mashing the keys, misspelling words because my fat sausage fingers can't quite hit one key at a time, I tend to take a break when I feel I have accomplished enough in that one spurt. During these breaks, I sometimes check the cool little features tucked away in Final Draft, such as what percentage of the dialogue thus far belongs to which character? Another I check is the profanity list which keeps a running count of how many curses you have used so far, what they are, and where they occur. I never change any of it because of the list, mind you, but it does make me over analyze my writing. For instance, in one script, my characters uttered fuck 23 times, mother fucker 4 times and shit 40 times. So 67 curses there. And that's my Rom/Com! (it's also a fairly dark one, but that should go without saying) To be fair, the entire screenplay contains over fifteen thousand words, so that's not too bad, is it?

So question: Do you ever feel you're cursing too much in a screenplay? Or do you feel good writing is good writing no matter if it's full of swears, or clean as a whistle? I tend to follow the latter, but I'm just curious.

Knocked Up: The Most Evil Film Ever!

2008-01-20T12:38:00.000-05:00

I just watched Knocked Up, the Judd Apatow film, a few weeks ago. I liked it. I wasn't blown away by it. If anything, I thought Apatow kind of wussed out by making the Seth Rogen character come to his senses and begin to try and be a father. But that was that, and I hadn't thought about it much since. Until I realized there are some people who are calling the film sexist. What?

I'll deal with this quote first, from Joe Queenan of The Guardian. "the latest in a new genre of romantic comedies in which an unappealing hero gets together with a gorgeous, successful woman."

Ok, first things first, who is he to judge what male is unappealing? Secondly, even if Rogen's character Ben is unappealing for the first hour of the film, it only shows that he changes for the woman during the second half of the film. Wouldn't that constitute a man righting himself for a woman? And finally, since when do gorgeous women not date what outsiders would consider below their class? It happens all the time. Hell, it's happened to me. And I always believed it was because men are so superficial, they go after beauty, or hotness first and foremost, while woman tend to put more (too much)of an emphasis on personality. Is Alison (Heigl) too good for Ben ( Rogen) in Knocked Up? In the beginning and on the surface, yes (and if using common sense, which often has little to do with who hooks up with who). However, let me point out a few factors here.

1) The initial bar scene where Ben and Alison meet is very realistic. Know why I know this? I've had it happen to me. I met a girl who was 24, model beautiful, and we got intoxicated. I woke up at her house. We dated for a few months, and that was that. Now, I'm certainly not the ugliest man alive, and could be counted as above average in certain circles. I'm in the 70 percentile. But this girl? She is a 99 percenter. Would this anger the film critics as well? Would this anger women too? I play video games, slum around in sweats during the weekend, and hate work with a passion. I have a crude sense of humor. Yet I date pretty woman all the time. What's the problem? So what I'm trying to show here is that while woman get aggravated by seemingly slobby men who shack up with the hottest of hot woman in film, it's actually holding a mirror to the real world. Do I need to direct women to "Hot chicks with douchebags"? For any woman who wonders why females are portrayed this way on film, take a gander at the human garbage the woman over at that site get hooked up with. Then explain it to me.

2) It is Ben who steps up to the plate when told about the pregnancy. Yes he acts like a huge ass when Alison first mentions this to him during a dinner. Which is realistic for the character up to that point. But he does step up and offer support, though he has no idea what kind of support he should lend. He is doing what a man should do-owning up to his responsibility.

3) Ben changes his entire persona to become a better partner for Alison. Why is that overlooked? And they seemingly live happily ever after.

How is this sexist? Ben and Alison made a mistake. They came together to deal with it. They found that they had more in common then they thought and stay together. To me, the formula for the movie goes like this: Boy meets girl/boy and girl make bad mistake/though seemingly from different sides of the track, they try to make it work/they find out more about themselves and end up loving each other. End of story.

Since I read the review in The Guardian, I've read many women upset over this and all I can say is, deal with it! When gorgeous women in the real world stop dating ugly guys with cash, or average looking guys who make them laugh, or when they stop slobbering over ratty dive bar cover band guitarists, or when they stop giving me play, then you may have beef. Until then, realize you're actually angry at yourself, for you are the template for these films.

"Write Club" Repost: For Motivational Purposes Only

2008-01-19T13:55:00.000-05:00

Back in February of '06, I posted the Tyler Durden Motivational System to help myself, and others, through the winter writers blues . Well here it is again, back for the attack:

Fuck off with your sofa units and serine green stripe patterns, I say never be complete, I say stop being perfect, I say let... lets evolve, let the chips fall where they may.

People do it everyday, they talk to themselves... they see themselves as they'd like to be, they don't have the courage you have, to just run with it.

Man, I see in write club the strongest and smartest men who've ever lived. I see all this potential, and I see squandering. God damn it, an entire generation pumping gas, waiting tables; slaves with white collars. Advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate so we can buy shit we don't need. We're the middle children of history, man. No purpose or place. We have no Great War. No Great Depression. Our Great War's a spiritual war... our Great Depression is our lives. We've all been raised on television to believe that one day we'd all be millionaires, and movie gods, and rock stars. But we won't. And we're slowly learning that fact. And we're very, very pissed off.

You're not your job. You're not how much money you have in the bank. You're not the car you drive. You're not the contents of your wallet. You're not your fucking khakis. You're the all-singing, all-dancing crap of the world.

Listen up, maggots. You re not special. You are not a beautiful or unique snowflake. You're the same decaying organic matter as everything else.

Without pain, without sacrifice, we would have nothing.

Fuck what you know. You need to forget about what you know, that's your problem.

Self improvement is masturbation. Now self destruction...

I'm off to write!

I'm A Screenwriter-Back The F*ck Up!

2008-01-19T10:17:00.000-05:00

Something amazing happened the other day. I was introduced to a person, a friend of a friend. We got to talking and eventually I was asked what I do. For the first time ever, I said "I'm a screenwriter." The first time I've said that without a long pause, without an explanation immediately following that proclamation. The first time I've said that without a tinge of embarrassment. For once I didn't fret over the inevitable follow up question, "What have you written?", or "Have I seen any of your stuff?"

I'm doing what I want to do, what I love to do, and if I die broke in the gutters of the Sunset strip, you will know me by the trail of my dead scripts.

Swingers, Los Feliz and the Money Go Round pt 1

2008-01-19T09:27:00.000-05:00

I think I've settled on an area of LA that has both semi affordable rent, is close to downtown and Hollywood and all that those two places entail, and isn't run down and gang infested. Los Feliz, home of Swingers, the movie. And The Derby, more importantly. It's either Los Feliz, or move into Hollywood, however Hollywood is a tad more expensive. And by tad, I mean a few hundred dollars a month.

I've been talked out of west Hollywood because supposedly it is gay only. That's a joke, but that's what people make it sound like. I'm still going to check it out when me and my buddy fly out there during the summer. North Hollywood is very appealing to me if only for the arts district, but it seems like a pain in the ass to drive to Hollywood/downtown. There's like two roads leading in and out, at least that's all I see on Google Earth.

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Now, about my writing. I've been intermittently working on all my projects. This time of year is very slow in the construction business, so we're driving an average of 4 hours per day (up and back total) just to get a days pay. Which leaves me run down and aggravated by the time I get home. But the good news is this lease is up at the end of February, and that will loosen up my purse strings a ton. I've been paying $900 a month for a one bedroom here, and I couldn't afford it from day 1. Not necessarily the rent alone, but the bills and rent combined do throw me into debt monthly.

And it'll all be over by March 1st! So in the mean time, I'm focusing on The Office spec exclusively, since that has a deadline date. Then when I move into my new place, I'll have more time, money and a new lease on life to get things done.

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The WGA and the strike/

Just got into a debate with my boss about the strike. He thinks the writers are ridiculous in asking for residuals...for anything at all. He used this example: If I hire someone to draw up blueprints for a house, and then get someone to build that house, do I then have to give them a cut of the money when I sell it?

I'm no Craig Mazin, but this analogy is terrible for about 12 different reasons. I won't bore you with the details, because frankly, others have argued this issue more eloquently than I ever could. (Mr. August, Mr. Mazin) I'll just sum up my feelings. The writers deserve everything they're asking for. On a personal level, I sometimes look at screenwriters as martyrs for a film project. They do all of this work to get the initial idea into ready to shoot condition, which includes getting their script tampered with by the suits, then they're tossed aside being paid far less than they should. On a professional level, I understand there's a hierarchy in Hollywood, so I don't expect writers to suddenly be placed on a pedestal like directors are. And I don't expect the WGA to gain everything they have put on the table. But I do support them. My boss is...well...a boss. He sees money going from his pocket to anyone else, and he has a conniption. Even paychecks. He can't stand to pay people, but looks at it as a necessary evil. So he only begrudgingly gives out our hard earned pay. Currently, that reminds me of the Hollywood big wigs.

"California (California) Knows How To Party"

2008-01-11T15:23:00.000-05:00

As I type this, I can barely believe it, but yes, I have decided to move to California. More specifically, either downtown LA, West Hollywood or 'the valley'. It's kind of time. I have no relationship holding me back. No children. No home. If anyone dies out there, it'll be me alone. No one besides me depending on my pay check.

Yes, it just felt like time to commit. So I have decided that by the end of this year, I shall be in la la land. It also gives me a nice goal for finishing up the projects I have here. All in all, I'm excited about it.

I Think We've Progressed

2008-01-09T20:22:00.001-05:00

Thinking on the Obama win in Iowa the other night, I realized that I found myself openly rooting for a candidate for the first time since...maybe ever. What I also realized much later, and more importantly, is that the thought of Mr. Obama's ethnicity never crossed my mind. Not even in the "Oh God, I hope he doesn't get shot" type of way that's floating around out there on the bloggernet. I'm not exactly a bleeding heart either. I'm kind of whole mess of radicalism with a dash of some traditional conservatism, and just enough modern liberalism thrown in to assure the folks I'm not a gun toting militia member...yet. Which pretty much means I'm all over the map. Most of all, I am very distrusting of the government, and this makes sense as I was born in the 70's, after the assassination decade of the 60's. My entire outlook has been molded from people who strongly distrust anyone in power anywhere. However, there I was, feeling inspired by this man. Could he really be the one to lead us into change? We don't know that just yet.

But look how far we've come..a state like Iowa, something like 94% white, endorses a black candidate. And most of all, I'm glad not everyone thought about an assassination attempt. In fact, I believe we've progressed so much that if there were an attempt on Obama's life, there would be no segregation, everyone would riot. I could be wrong, but that's how I feel.

2008 Outline

2008-01-07T20:02:00.000-05:00

Since New Years went by without a list of resolutions...or a headache, I now present my ten things I intend to do and by do I mean accomplish 100% or so help me sir I will go fucking ballistic.

10. The Office Spec-get it done this month
9. Then on to Death By Dating, which I want to begin filming by the end of the year.
8. Film one of my feature projects in the coming months.
7. Write Wombies and film a trailer/short for it.
6. Do not flunk out of The Art Institute..keep the A- at the very least.
5. Switch majors from Graphic Design to Media Arts and Animation when the time comes (May)
4. Score a film, preferably my own.
3. Begin the graphic novel I always wanted to do.
2. Do something with that Metallica project I've been bouncing around. Admit it's a great idea and do something with it. Whether it's just the script, a short, the graphic novel or an animated feature.
1. Location-decide by the end of the year if I can move to Cali. Last chance.

My hope is that a couple of these can be combined so that it's really 5 things and not 9 separate objectives.

Fear of Sucking

2008-01-06T16:41:00.000-05:00

So I sat down and began doing a admittedly rudimentary outline for my The Office spec. I have all my ideas formulated and the characters involvement prepped. Since it's an ensemble cast, I decided to try and determine which characters are essential to the plot of this episode. Five are essential to my story, while the others will be featured much like they are now. Witty reactions or comments strewn throughout the episode, as well as a few talking head segments.

So I'm buzzing along, minding my own business when fear and loathing, that old adversary of mine, decides to pop in and check up on my progress. After kindly directing his attention to my narcissistic progress indicators held within this pages sidebar, a chuckle slowly arose until it muted out everything else lodged in my brain. It was quite condescending and it instantly revealed me for what I am: a scared little writer-man. I put this prep into my projects and think I'm ready to dive in, only to do even more prep. It's the worst sort of procrastination there is because in reality I'm not prepping anything. I'm hiding from my fear. The fear of sucking. It's almost comical the ways in which I try to avoid admitting this to myself. Excuse after excuse seep out of my ear hole and it makes me feel better. I'll just drink another 2 liter of Coke. Yeah, that'll help. Oh look, football is on, let me go check that game out and think on my script ideas for awhile.

Well, no more. I am once again starting my ten day first draft challenge. A couple of years back, I was going through a similar bout of self mutilation when I decided to begin a program. I would force myself to write a first draft of a feature length screenplay in ten days time. And it worked like a charm. I banged out three or four scripts in a month or six weeks. By the end of the fourth screenplay, I was so exhausted mentally I wept as I typed the final page out. I then proceeded to go over each one and make immediate changes where I felt it was needed. Those scripts served me well. It was probably the best writing I have ever done. *RANDOM RANT BEGINS HERE-I am well aware of the fact that some scribes in the bloggernet find it embarrassing that a screenwriter would admit to writing a first draft in ten days (gasp!). I happen to wholeheartedly disagree with that sentiment. Some incredible scripts have been written in twenty four hours, seven days or two weeks. I would not assume to know how long a 'genius' idea takes to ferment in ones brain, nor do I think taking four months on a first draft is in anyway faulty logic. But I do know that the sooner your first draft is out, the sooner you can go about a rewrite. END RANT/*

So beginning tomorrow, I am entering into the constipated writer's rehab program. I will keep all abreast of my progress, not to brag as others seem to think, but to show my dedication to screenwriting. To show this is my chosen path and I take it seriously. And most of all, to get my ass in gear.

The Screenplay Contest-Why Bother?

2008-01-06T11:35:00.000-05:00

I have entered about 10 screenplay competitions in the last 4 years. And each and every time I enter, the results come back the same. Half the people absolutely love my work. The other half tear it to shreds. Without fail, this relegates my screenplay into middling territory. Purgatory, if you will. (I did finish in the top 10 twice which makes the bad reviews hurt even more) This isn't a one or two time occurrence. It's just about unanimous. I've tried to write more mainstream stuff but my writing ends up going somewhere darker than I intended. And while I love black humor, many don't get it, or just don't like it. One more disappointment and I'm going all out writing Failure to Launch II. Fuck it.

So the time is near. To enter or not to enter? I'm leaning towards not entering anything except the Nickelodeon fellowship. Which reminds me...I had better get that The Office script going.

I'll leave my readership (two people, including me) with this question: Which screenplay contests are worth the hassle? Like risk vs reward sort of thing? Because, dude, I'm not made of green and I've been eating Ramen noodles for weeks now.

A Better Way To Elect A President

2008-01-05T11:44:00.000-05:00

Since this two party system rarely displays the democratic process the way it was envisioned, here is my new and improved presidential test.

10 questions:

10. Do you belong to any secret societies such as the Skull and Bones? If yes, you're out of the race.
9. Do you belong, or know anyone who belongs to the trilateral commission? If yes, you're out.
8. Do you or your spouse make more than $500,000 in a single year? Yes? Out!
7. Free health care for all? No, or anything aside from a straight up yes, and you're out!
6. Do your religious beliefs inform your decisions on policy at all? Yes? Goodbye.
5. Do you endorse a national i.d. card? Yes and you're gone.
4. Do you consider Saudi Arabia a good friend of America? Yes, and your oil loving ass can live there full time.
3. Have you ever smoked dope, been arrested or gotten a DWI(not necassarily in the same night)? No, and you're out.
2. Do you support the legalization of most drugs? No? buh-bye
1. Electric cars for all? Answers of no, talk of hybrids... or hydrogen fuel... and you're done.

And your 2008 President is..................0 results. Enjoy Hillary as a substitute!

I Here A Bare Braking Into My Home

2008-01-05T01:51:00.000-05:00

I'm not an illiterati, however I do tend to misspell words when I'm typing fast and furiously at the keyboard. My mistakes are normally the contextual type, such as hear/here or bare/bear. It's not that I don't know the differences between the two, it's that I'm often typing how the word sounds and not paying attention. Sometimes there are two words that are very confusing in how they're used. So I offer this link, Common Errors In English, to all who may share this affliction. It's a quick one page listing of all odd ball phrases or spellings of words, as well as the two words that sound the same but are otherwise by no means similar. It works nicely as a quick reference page. Especially when you're knee deep into a screenplay and want the quickest possible information.

Progress Bars Or: How I Began Feeding My Narcissism

2008-01-04T19:01:00.000-05:00

Ever since David and his blog Man Bytes Hollywood informed the bloggernet in June '05 (actually even earlier than that)that we could track our progress through cool color bars, we've been strapped to the nines full of 'em. Hell, at one point I had eight separate progress bars on my blog.

Well, here I have some spanking new progress bars to show off...despite the fact that there isn't really any progress to display. The act of adding these to my blog reminds me of the famous Tyler Durden quote in Fight Club. "Self improvement is just masturbation". In this case the quote should read "Self acknowledgment is just masturbation". What have I accomplished? Nothing. Yet here I am showing my "nothing" to the world in fancy crimson blood percentage points. As you take a gander and marvel at my works which are tantamount to failures, please remember to feed the monster on the way out.

Blood Recipe

2008-01-03T12:15:00.000-05:00

For those that asked.

1 c. Karo Syrup

1 Tbsp Water

2 Tbsp Red Food Coloring

1 tsp Yellow Food Coloring

You may want to fiddle with a little blue to add some different variations on color. You could go Italian horror style, bright red, or more modern dark red.

Humans Fit To Eat

2008-01-03T10:56:00.000-05:00

Humans are the dopiest species on the planet. Accomplishing two tasks at once seems almost an impossibility. I mean, really, if I see one more middle aged woman driving an SUV over three lanes of traffic with a cell phone glued to her ear I may just go off. However, there is nothing worse these days than wiggers. How many punk wiggers do I have to get the stare down from? I'm walking in Macy's (horrifying as that is) and this douche decides he's going to play chicken with me. He walks by, hat cocked, like he's built of granite, though he weighs 105 soak and fucking wet. And I have to make the emasculating choice of swaying my shoulder out of his shoulders path so that I can have a peaceful afternoon at my home instead of a break down in a holding cell. I hear his muttering under his breath as he makes for the exterior doors. A twinge in my neck tells me I should have squashed that punk. Yet, here I am being the bigger man, both figuratively and literally. I probably have three inches on the kid, and I'd venture a guess, a legit 150lbs.

Now the question is should I have strangled the kid until he was purple like I wanted, or did I do the right thing? And if I did do the right thing, why do I feel like it's oh so wrong? This is the reason the club scene is off limits for me. Guys are so idiotic, posturing like we're cave men in a cave clan. And I know that I can't resist it for a full night, because after all, I am man, and deep down, I'm a stupid douchebag as well. I suppose I just control my idiocy, but being out in this world today for me is akin to those old fake snake in a can pranks (Snakes in a can!). I have a lid on my primal tendencies but at any moment the lid will pop off and some yellow and black velvety snake will come out and give someone a well deserved heart attack.

And let me say this now: young white girls are just about as stupid as can be. Sure, they've always been naive, how else would guys get laid so early and often? But now, not only do young white girls think the hip hop culture is theirs, they play it out to the hilt. They dress like the fucking men for shit sake! The cocked Yankees cap, the crooked peace sign, the sweats around their ankles, you know the style. And listen, as a guy speaking here, if I were 18 again, I wouldn't care. But looking at it now, I just shudder to think that these girls will have children some day, probably sooner than later, and the kid will be walking around sagging. Probably because the diaper is full, but you get the point.

I can only imagine how black dudes feel. Not about the dopey white girls, because I know how they feel about them (easy pickens). But these white guys who make a mockery of the hip hop culture. I wonder if they have the feelings I have, torture scenes included? Or do they respect these punks? I have no clue.

Maybe because I'm just another dumb white man.

All Your Search Belong To Us

2008-01-02T17:37:00.000-05:00

including this google search: best sawzall for fucking

Yep, I guess my many posts on sawzall fucking have pushed me up the ranks with google.

Inland Empire

2008-01-02T00:04:00.000-05:00

I just watched (finally) David Lynch's latest and I have to say it blew me away. Even better than Mulholland Drive. Laura Dern was amazing. the music was pitch perfect, and the cinematography was as good as it gets. Imagine The Lost Highway intertwined with Mulholland Drive, and a dash of Eraserhead, running just one minute under three hours. It's as scary as it sounds. And as brilliant. Seriously, this is as scared as I've been during a film in years. This is psychological horror at its best. There are at least 10-15 different scenes that had me either jumping out of my chair, or feeling as if I was about to do so at any moment.

I cannot recommend this movie enough.

"Death has come to your little town, Sheriff"

2008-01-01T19:06:00.001-05:00

I would be the sheriff. The town would be Maple Shade, NJ. As soon as I moved back from Florida to pursue my intentions of directing my own film, Generator, I was hit with death. My grandfather was deathly ill and passed away shortly thereafter(I believe I mentioned this in one of my last blog updates). During the following months, I wasn't making much headway with my film project for a variety of reasons. Expecting people to work for free is naive at best, disaster at worst. My experience falls right in the center of the two. Despite laying all of the groundwork for the film, I hadn't been hands on with people enough. Meaning I didn't really explain the finer details to them. Such as which scene we'd be shooting upon the first night. And after I did, I didn't follow up and make sure they were ready, I just assumed it. That's when lack of money began to rear it's f'n face. My girlfriend/roomate upped and left about a year ago, leaving me with the full rent of which I of course cannot afford without forgoing just about everything else, film included. I get out of the lease this February. And that will get me back on track, I think. But anyway, one meandering month after another passed and I still hadn't gotten anything filmed. While this was going on, my father passed away. To make a long story short, I hadn't seen him in 16 years, but it was shock to the system anyway for many reasons I won't get into now. So a few more months go by, and my grandmother turns out to be very ill. Within months, she is bed ridden in the hospital and I'm making a decision to take her off the ventilator (she never wanted it anyway). She died the next morning peacefully. (A couple of weeks ago just before Christmas)

So here I am, almost two years back and nothing to show for it. To make matters worse, I completely neglected my writing since I was in producing/directing mode. And now, as I try to ease back into it, I am at a total loss as to how to proceed. There's just nothing there. Great ideas, sure. But shit, everyone has great ideas. Then I remembered this little blog I used to rant on, one that started because of the same exact thing- a lack of direction, motivation and some pretty hefty writer's block. It's not called the constipated writer because I was a writing machine when I started this, right? And to my surprise, it is still here. I'm quite sure nobody is linked up with me anymore, but that's okay. I get to write without really realizing it, and perhaps that will spur me on to my projects.

Which are:
1. Spec script of The Office for the Nickelodeon fellowship.
2. Death by Dating-dark comedy feature length script
3. Wombies-dark comedy-feature length script

So there you have it. A harrowing journey just like I always expected it to be. However, the good thing is I still have the location. I still have the actors. And I still have the ambition to make Generator. And I think I will.

Shut. Up.

2006-07-11T13:53:00.000-04:00

The production meeting went well...as well as I could expect when the room is full of long time friends. We discussed possible scheduling issues, the importance of continuity(a word which nobody could pronounce for some reason), contracts, releases, table reads, walk throughs, grooming and wardrobe.

Next meeting is going to be the 25th on location so the fools can see what they're in for.

One of the people at the meeting was being ...not so supportive. At least that's the feeling I got. I always get the same feeling with this person no matter what we're doing. It seems this person feels in competition with me, though I have no idea why. This person shall remain nameless until he/she cops up to being jealous, or I fire he/she.

Why volunteer for a movie if you don't want to support me? Who f'n knows?! //////////

The horror site I write reviews for has gone to blog format...which means it's not a website anymore. They say it's to get more exposure, I say that's horseshit. I applied for a reviewing job with another well known site that takes it's craft seriously. It's not a horror site, but it's cool nonetheless.//////////

It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia is hilarious. Catch it on FX whenever the hell it's on. I think Sundays, or Thursdays. I enjoy seeing the city on tv and recognizing all of the areas. It's a shame more films aren't made in Philly. The city should be right up there with Chicago, but I think more films come out of the windy city. That's how it appears anyway. I might shoot a scene or two there just for the fuck of it./////////

When did Mtv become this annoying? The Hills, My Sweet Sixteen, Yo Momma and Cribs. Better known as how to infuriate yourself if you're over 25 years old. We wonder what's wrong with the world, and there it is in full glory. Anyone who watches those shows is a masochist, and anyone who enjoys them thinks they're going to be in position to be 'famous' by telling mom jokes from 1985. No lie, I heard one guy tell the old 'Your momma is like 7 eleven, she's always open". Wha????? I told that joke. In, no exaggeration, 1980. The spectators are the worst, covering their mouth because they have to hold in their hyena like cackling.

How do I know all of this if it's so horrifying? My girlfriend watches some of the shows, and now it's like a goddamn car accident. I have to see how bad it can get. But still, I've only caught bits and pieces of a few of the shows, and it's enough to deem Mtv hell in a hand basket.

The first official production meeting for Generator

2006-06-20T13:23:00.000-04:00

...is to take place on July 7th, with a rain date of the 14th. I'll be sure to update more frequently from then on, maybe with some pics of the motley crew. Right now I'm searching for paperwork for the cast and crew to sign...in blood.

On another note, I entered the FX channel "It's always sunny in Philadelphia" contest. Little did I know almost all of the 20 selected semifinalists entered trailers, and not a comedy short, or an entire scene from an existing show they made prior. LAME. You mean to tell me you reward people for splicing together a trailer from existing material rather than actually taking a story, making it cohesive enough to make sense in the 5 minutes allotted and actually delivering a full, albeit narrative? I have to call bullshit on that one. Stupid me, I thought the idea was to show an idea for a pilot in short form and that the idea could translate into a series. I took the entire 'series' part of the equation very seriously, and thought my idea would work for at least 5 years, or 101 episodes. My idea was entitled 101 Debacles, and each week, I would show one of those debacles in all of it's glory. Most of them are from my life, or things I tend to think about all my life. Could have been great! (just like my life, coincidentally enough) But anyway, here's the first episode if interested. Keep in mind I had exactly 48 hours to film, edit and submit this. Debacle #1: The Myth of the Powdered Nose

Check back for all Generator, all the time beginning the weekend of the 7th.

Hi, My Name Is, Hi

2006-05-26T12:13:00.000-04:00

A little update to the 3 people who continue to check my blog-I think I have found a special FX guy for Generator. He just graduated from the Tom Savini FX school, which is exactly what I was looking for....exactly. The reason? He'll be looking to take a job to make a name for himself, and he'll work for credit, just like everyone involved in the movie. He's a couple of hours away, but said he can make it work. We're going to meet up next week to have a sit down and go over the script.

Just about everything is lining up for the film to kick ass.

By the way, anyone who thinks Yo Momma is funny, or any of that other garbage on Mtv, should be drawn and quartered immediately. The decline of civilization can happen very quickly, apparently.

Been A Long Time Since I Pumped Up The Volume

2006-04-25T20:11:00.000-04:00

Nothing all that new to report. And that's part of the problem with this blog. I used to have tons of complaints, ideas, and other random musings that I cared enough to interact with the blogosphere(I hate that fucking word). Now, there is almost nothing concrete for me to add about Generator. There are some ideas, some creative advertising scams, and just some fucked up ideas I have for the shoot, but all of that is either not a definite, or sealed until the movie is complete. I had a death in the family, which while expected, still hurt like hell. I was there when my grandfather took his last breath in the house he and my grandmother shared since I was a little kid. So leading up to that point, I spent a lot of time taking care of him and my grandmother. I still am taking care of my grandmother. So that's part of my disappearance, but honestly, I just have nothing of worth to give you. When I start working on the movie, I will definitely pick up the pace, but until then, I wouldn't hate you if you just popped in once a month or so. Or randomly check on IMDB for updates...hell, you could even start posting on the message board for my film if you wish. So until I am knee deep in production, which could be next month, or September, I will not be updating regularly. As if you didn't know that already.

Bye.

An Update

2006-03-22T15:37:00.000-05:00

I've been very busy, and will continue to be, but I'm trying to add an update and visit each blog I link to, at least once a week.

I finally took the absinthe plunge with the strongest recipe , and most authentic to the 19th century, King Of Spirits Gold. My buddy and I polished off about 1/2 a bottle and the buzz was definitely ...different. I had a warm, kind of floaty buzz, and a 1000 tooth smile. We were watching VH1 Classic when David Bowie, Space Oddity came on. That was the height of the 'high', and it lasted for about 20 minutes. We also watched some HD programming on Discovery about Spain, or something...looked real real nice with absinthe in the system. Sadly, we didn't keep it going for longer than those twenty minutes, and the high disappeared and we ended up slightly buzzed for the remainder of the night. I'll take pictures or video of us preparing it next time. Right now, I have to recommend it because of the potential-if I could feel the way I did for those 20 minutes for an entire night, wow...I may have a real problem not drinking it!

On another front, all is quiet on the Generator front for now. I have a meeting set up with the owner of my main location. I expect an extortion attempt, honestly. Sure, he's married to my Mother, but I know what drives him. Thankfully, I am quite the charmer in person. Once I get him immersed in the proposed story, and what I plan on using to accent the movie, I think he'll jump on board. And invest too.

I'm thinking about holding off on shooting until Fall. My sister is due in August, and I really like her as the leading girl. It's basically a perfect match, and I still haven't found anyone who wants to seize the opportunity yet. It would also give me more time to raise funds, do some sneaky ass promos on the internet, and leak some publicity to certain sites with photos and short trailers. We'll see how it goes. I'll have my business name registered shortly as a sole proprietor business. I have major ideas for moving my new toys to an office space that may or may not be available to me....lots of updates upcoming about everything I only hint at right now.

Slay The Beast

2006-03-14T17:37:00.000-05:00

Film is dead?

M. Night sounds like he's completely off his rocker. Makes me wonder if anyone even realizes why film is the preferred method for movies. It's out of habit, nothing more, nothing less. We've become accustomed to movies appearing one way. Once we break that connection, nobody will care, and film will die, albeit 30 years later than it should have.

I'm Back Again

2006-03-06T01:24:00.000-05:00

The move was a success. I have a Billy Joel concert on Tuesday. (I love that drunk bastard, circa '71-'81)

I'll give a new update on Generator in the coming days.

IMDB Accepts!

2006-02-23T16:36:00.000-05:00

Since I am losing my internet access soon, I just thought I would pop in and update-Generator has been added to IMDB, and the credits will be added this week. Being a stubborn prick does accomplish something after all.

Final Stats-7 Submission attempts/1 Successful Submission

Save For Your Funeral...I'll be Broke When I'm Dead

2006-02-22T15:18:00.000-05:00

I always accuse my girlfriend Katie of being the eternal optimist, the girl who still believes in the American dream. She likes to save pennies because someday they'll add up to a nice vacation. Me? I spend my upcoming check in full to take the damn vacation now. So, my electric may be turned off. So what? I'll get it turned on again. (a slight exaggeration...I usually pay it just before it's turned off) I am throwing my nuts out there to make a movie, and starting with what amounts to very little in terms of budget. I believe the budget will grow as I go. This infuriates her. How can I waste my time, and what will I do if midway through the budget hasn't received any bumps? What about saving money? I say burn baby burn!

Ah, Katie. You're saving for your own funeral. At least you'll have a nice golden casket, and I'll be stuck with a cardboard box. But I'll be smiling.
-------------------------------------------------

I am very down on writing right now. In the past two years, I have seen two of my more well known screenplay efforts(to me, people around me and some on the left coast) end up as feature films. Only they weren't mine. You see, we get a very short window to get our shit out there while it's fresh. The problem being we have no outlet, no exposure, and all we can do is enter 30 contests a year with the hopes that one of the readers will be a fan of the genre we've chosen. And then it's gone. Then, as if smelling your disappointment and wanting to rub it in some, Hollywood releases 10 films that could just as well have been based on your screenplay. It's either A)everything is in production all the time, or B) a wave of certain genres of screenplays hit 2 years after I tried to market one just like the it. Either way, it's disheartening to try and sell your story, then 4 years later see the Best Buy shelves deluged with direct to dvd versions of the exact same premise. So now when I get the comment, "It's really good. Solid story, great twist at the end. But don't you think it's a little to close to ? " Well, I wrote this 5 years ago. "Oh, well it seems just like it." , it makes me want to lop a few heads off. Hence, I'm making my films from now on. I'll write them how I want to write them. And I'll make them how I want to fucking make them. If I don't get rich I won't care. I'll be creating a lasting legacy, something my children can see. Something to show I did something.

All Quiet On The Southern Front

2006-02-20T17:32:00.000-05:00

It's going to be a slow week or two for me, blog wise. I'm moving back north in 8 days, and have a lot of garbage to get rid of or pack away. (Though I'm leaning towards trashing everything)
I reapplied for IMDB on the 15th, with the Variety link included, and have yet to hear back. I'm cautiously taking that as a good sign since the last time I submitted, it took only two days to turn me back.

If anything new hits, I'll pop in.

The Tyler Durden Motivational System For Writers

2006-02-15T21:57:00.000-05:00

Fuck off with your sofa units and serine green stripe patterns, I say never be complete, I say stop being perfect, I say let... lets evolve, let the chips fall where they may.

People do it everyday, they talk to themselves... they see themselves as they'd like to be, they don't have the courage you have, to just run with it.

Man, I see in fight club the strongest and smartest men who've ever lived. I see all this potential, and I see squandering. God damn it, an entire generation pumping gas, waiting tables; slaves with white collars. Advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate so we can buy shit we don't need. We're the middle children of history, man. No purpose or place. We have no Great War. No Great aDepression. Our Great War's a spiritual war... our Great Depression is our lives. yWe've all been raised on television to believe that one day we'd all be millionaires, and movie gods, and rock stars. But we won't. And we're slowly learning that fact. And we're very, very pissed off.

You're not your job. You're not how much money you have in the bank. You're not the car you drive. You're not the contents of your wallet. You're not your fucking khakis. You're the all-singing, all-dancing crap of the world.

Listen up, maggots. You re not special. You are not a beautiful or unique snowflake. You're the same decaying organic matter as everything else.

Without pain, without sacrifice, we would have nothing.

Fuck what you know. You need to forget about what you know, that's your problem.

Self improvement is masturbation. Now self destruction...

F*ck Me! Pay You!

2006-02-15T18:55:00.000-05:00

My production chart for Generator is now listed in Variety. Next up, IMDB-fascist punks.

The script is about as far along as I want it to be at this point. I want to add two more sequences I have been thinking up, but finding the right spot to insert them has been troublesome. There's one scene I am probably going to tear out of the script as soon as the new two are cut in. Other than that, the rewrite process is a done deal. ...for now. Since I'll have 6 days in between each day of shooting, I can see me fiddling around with the coming weeks material, but for now, it's about done.

Just thought I would add, I payed IMDB for the PRO membership, and again was turned down. I'm coming back with an arm full of Variety suckers, and they had best follow their own guidelines and submit it. They had best! V for Variety

For Those Who Wondered "WTF Is A RotoZip ?"

2006-02-11T15:43:00.000-05:00

In my script, I often mention name brand tools, but since people don't have the background I do , which is in construction, they have no clue what's happening in the scene. Well fear not, here are a few examples of said tools:

#1-The Rotozip-Rotozip is a brand name, under Bosch tools, which specializes in small hand saws. Here is an example of tools that might fall under the RZ name:

A small circular saw and grinder which pretty much works for everything from ceramic tile to wood.

#2-This is the famous Rotozip I describe in the script, however, I had to use the Porter Cable brand since I couldn't get a good pic:

This is my favorite. It fits in the palm of your hand, making it really f'n convenient. We use this for cutting around electrical boxes, or for cutting the openings for the boxes into the sheet rock before we hang it. This is one of the tools described in the script. :)

#3-The following bad boy is a mini rotating saw. The blade rotates in a two inch circumference, creating nice circular holes in wood for whatever you may need them for. This thing is nasty.

#4-Another personal favorite-The Sawzall. Sawzall is a Milwaukee tools trademark, I think, but we call every make and model a Sawzall, so I'm not sure. At any rate, this fucker will cut through anything. The blade pumps back and forth real fast, but you can control the speed. You can also change the blades for cutting metal, wood, tile, sheet rock, skin and bone...um..yeah...

So there you have it. Makes reading my script a little more logical...and disgusting, eh?

And yes, I am trying to gain clearance to use the actual tools I put in the script. :)

"We Will Not List Your Film...Unless You Have $13 A Month"

2006-02-10T12:43:00.000-05:00

IMDB apparently does accept independent films in early stages of production. They even accept titles from newly formed production companies. You just have to join IMDBPro. If it was about the money, couldn't they just tell me that in the beginning? Anyway, we'll see if my film meets the criteria for it, because I'm going to suck it up and join. If it goes through, it'll be the best money I ever spent. Aside from that time I bought microdots with Christian...ah, the good old days.

Edit: I may be getting my production chart published in The Hollywood Reporter, which would knock down the barrier that is IMDB. I don't want to jinx it right now, but stay tuned.

"Too Stupid To Know Better"

2006-02-08T22:47:00.000-05:00

I hear a lot of people say that, that they were too stupid to know any better, especially from those who made a splash into the film industry as directors. They take chances and use unconventional means to finish the job, because they are forced to. It's often why their first film remains their best, too. I wonder if I suffer from a little of that stupidity. People tell me I'm expecting to much of my first feature. But I can't see how. Are there little things that I don't notice right now that will trip me up? Definitely. But really, does a person need anything other than passion and drive to make a project happen? It's funny, when I worked in construction all those years, there was a saying amongst the foreman and big boss-Make It Happen. Don't have enough time to finish? Make it happen. The sheetrock wasn't delivered? Make it happen. Over and over again, the reply was basically NO COMPROMISE. Proceed as planned, because there is no other choice. I used to roll my eyes after hearing it spewed out by my foreman, who is an ex-marine. But years removed, I think it is exactly what I am doing now. The reason it never resonated before was that I didn't believe in what I was doing, and I didn't take a personal interest. It was a job I loathed much more than I loved. But now that I care about something, I can see I follow that advice on a daily basis. When I get turned down, I bitch and hate the world, but I don't give up. I find an alternate route.

Friend: How the hell did you get Metallica and Adidas to sign off on a clearance for this tiny movie?
Me: Um, I don't know really. And it's not tiny-it's budget unknown.
Friend: You know it's not normal, right?
Me: No, I don't know that.
Friend: So, how did you do it?
Me: Two emails, and two phone calls.
Friend: What?!
Me: Anyone can do it.
Friend: I don't think so. You got them for free. Why don't more people do it then?
Me: I don't know. All I did was call.

Too stupid to know whether or not this is the way things work. I just Made It Happen Whether this is normal or not is not the point. The point is, I don't know if it is or not. It's called drive.
----------------------------------------
I saw this in action in film school. Everyone wanted to be a director when the class started. After our first project, I would wager 50% wilted under the pressure and changed their aspirations accordingly. They gave up over one weekend, a 48 hour film contest, and that was that. It was a shame really. There were some real talented people who just didn't have that passion, or drive to finish one measly project. I stayed up 44 of those hours filming and editing, and didn't win a thing except some laughs from the crowd when we screened it. That kept me going though. I bet there were 300 people enrolled in my class. I would say 250 wanted to be directors. 6 months in, it probably dipped to 100. By graduation, I don't think it's crazy to say only 25 ended up sticking with directing as their main interest. Out of that 25, 10 will finish one feature film. 2 out of that 10 will attempt another. And it all comes down to making it happen.

I suppose there are certain personality traits that one must possess in order to have that stubborn drive, and I can't necessarily fault someone for a lack of those traits. I think you either got 'em, or you don't. I have a strong red personality. I'm stubborn, and I have innate leadership skills. I am also quite mean, and can almost become a God in my own mind overnight. Thankfully, I have a very big case of horrific self doubt immediately after to keep me grounded. Some people constantly pass the responsibility of the smallest jobs on a set to someone else(on amateur productions). Some have a chance to take charge and don't for fear of stepping on toes. Other's are content to be a grip for their entire life. And all of that is okay. But I'm not one of those people, and I think that's what will make this film a successful endeavor. I will just Make It Happen.

Denied!

2006-02-08T16:19:00.000-05:00

IMDB denied my application for a page twice! Their reasoning? I'm not far enough into pre-production(Funny, I feel knee fucking deep in it)), and I don't have a third party site announcing my film. Well guess what? Horrorbrain has put my press release on their front page! Go visit horrorbrain, which is part of the IGN network and take a gander! Extra thanks to Brandon(aka Gorefan), the head honcho over there, who graciously accepted my press release without trying to crush my little independent ass...as most horror sites have done.

Just to throw a tidbit out there-I may be gaining the right to use Black Sabbath's Solitude for my film. We'll see how this one shakes out!

Generator Update Part 2

2006-02-07T15:42:00.000-05:00

Adidas have allowed us to use their clothing for the lead actress, for free once again. Metallica and Adidas are going to get very special thanks from Damage Done Productions, that's for sure.

She will be sporting a green Adidas, 80's style jumper/track suit.

Generator Update

2006-02-06T16:58:00.000-05:00

#1) Metallica have kindly given us clearance to outfit one of the main characters in Generator with an...And Justice For All T shirt. Damn nice of them too, as I was expecting a 'no', or a huge charge. So that's awesome. (Intellectual property garbage is a pain in the ass-you can't have anything in your film without an okay...yes even clothes.) Justice is perhaps my favorite album of all time, bar none. Yeah ye yeah!!

#2) I created the Generator page for IMDB, and it's been submitted. I am currently awaiting approval, which I assume will be forthcoming. I offered all the information they ask for, with the exception of Distributor, Official site and a third party site link. Since I listed it as being in pre production, I don't think it should be a problem. And since it's truly in pre-production, I would hope they would allow it. So that just about kicks ass. Can't wait to lure private investors in through IMDB. (Hint: Professionals you may approach about investing are easily impressed by an IMDB listing-it makes the film real, even if you haven't shot one inch of footage! One of their first questions is "are you on IMDB?" Now I can say YES. Thank you Eli Roth for that one!) Now all I got to do is take some freaky stills to submit, and create a trailer. What a great day today was! I wish it was Groundhog Day!

Gah Dang It

2006-01-31T13:50:00.000-05:00

I just came up with the best opening credit sequence for Generator. It's so damn perfect, I wish I could film it tomorrow! Arg! The locations are all set, as are the crew and actors...the film is about ready to go! (If I ever finish those infernal storyboards!)

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I'm moving back to the mothership around the 20th, and I can't wait. Then I can really dig into preproduction. I can actually go to the location, instead of going off memory. I can meet with a special FX person instead of exchanging emails. I can test them to see if they can do a head cast. (and really, there's nothing better than that!) I can meet up with Chris the composer and show him the deal-take him out for a few beers and explain my vision.(we'll have to work out arrangements sir) So much excitement!

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Bye Bye Florida, I hardly knew ye, and the little I do know left thou with a bitter taste in thy mouth of thee...um, yeah.

Best things about Florida: 70 degrees in Winter. 24 hour beer supply. No pigs bothered me. All fast food joints take credit.

Worst things about FL: English is an antiquated notion apparently. The roads are like Thunderdome-anything goes! No discernible speed limit-left lane is evidently not for passing in this state. Horrible recycled water smell when sprinklers turn on, which is basically 4 times a day for 11 3/4 months. Yet, they don't require any other recycling-for shame. Violent crime is either the worst of any city area, or the news only covers violent crime. Either way, it's scary and depressing...and Taxi Driver persona inducing. Too many idiots who want to race their Hyundai. Too many idiots who want to race their Honda Civic. Too many idiots that want to put loud mufflers on toy cars. Not nearly enough idiots dead on black top.

Question

2006-01-25T07:39:00.000-05:00

Has anyone heard of Movie Jigsaw? It's a website that allows screenwriters the chance to choose a project idea they would like to develop from a pool of story ideas. The story ideas come from other members who aren't screenwriters, but I guess have story ideas they would like to see developed. Anybody heard anything about this place? It sounds like an okay idea in theory, but so does communism. You kind of bid on a property you're interested in, say, writing credit and 30% from final script sale, and if it's accepted, they hammer out a deal through an entertainment attorney before work is started.

I find it oddly enticing to work on another individuals story. What do you guys think?

Gluttony

2006-01-23T17:31:00.000-05:00

In the past two weeks, I have acquired the Panny camera, Sony Vegas 6.0 editing software, Sony DVD Architect 3.0 , Adobe After Effects, Sound Forge 7.0 and Acid Pro 5.0. And I'm slightly bedazzled with all of it. I'm going through some old tapes with Vegas so I can get the hang of it, and I'm fairly acclimated with non linear editing systems, so it's been an okay experience. The others are confusing as all hell. I made one cool song with Acid, but I always feel I need more loops, beats and samples. I don't think it'll work for scoring my film, though there is a package available for movie scores specifically. I'll try that out when I get more money.

If someone can tell me the difference between Sound Forge and Acid, that would be much appreciated. The PDF manuals are over 300 pages a piece, so I don't feel like going through them if I don't have to.

I also bought three Criterion Collection Dvds-Peeping Tom, Shock Corridor and Brazil. Oh yeah, and Blood and Black Lace:Slashers Edition.

And with all this gluttonous behavior, guess how much actual work I got done? Nada. Of course that's the point-I buy all these materials(well, not all are purchased) I don't need to keep the focus off of my actual work, which as far as I'm concerned is writing. Until I get to direct my film, I had better make use of the time for preproduction. It kind of sucks I'm STILL in FL, since everyone and everything involved with production is in NJ.

I might set up my IMDB page for Generator, though I'll have no pictures to put up yet. Not sure how it works, but that's my first order of business-internet visibility, even if in text only.

Arg! I want to get started!

Val Kilmer-Geico Spokesman

2006-01-22T20:59:00.000-05:00

Just something I've thought for awhile, and everyone thinks I'm crazy-this has got to be Val Kilmer-looks just like him!

My Star Has Walked Off The Set!

2006-01-20T16:42:00.000-05:00

My sister was playing the female lead in Generator, but she has since been confirmed to be pregnant. Not only am I due to be an Uncle, but I am now searching for a replacement. How unfortunate for me. Well, Uncle J is putting a call out there for any women who think they can sacrifice 1-2 days per week out of their busy schedule, and act in the process. Oh yeah, you'll have to around the NJ/Philly area. Come and get your chance to ...get all bloodied up.
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Burn Hollywood Burn! Remakes aplenty! The Last House On The Left, The Hills Have Eyes, Black Christmas, Halloween, Day Of The Dead, Rosemary's Baby, The Wicker Man, The Omen, The Thing, When A Stranger Calls, Friday The 13th, Dressed To Kill and many more! Go support these masterpieces you vermin! Seriously, it sickens me. People say get over it, but why should I? It's like my entire life is becoming on horrible Moby remix, complete with obligatory mid 'song' rap. And there are plenty of writers out there who would give up their script for rather cheap just to have a shot of getting it made. (me included) Instead they sink 20-30 million into each one of these abominations, just hoping the opening weekend will get them even. And it does, because there are enough idiots out there willing to shell out $8 just so they can complain on friggin, I don't know, IMDB about how horrible the film was. Well no shit moron! Save your money and complain about the movies existence, not the end result! Too many dumb shits on this planet.
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I have to say that I am finally moving back to NJ around February 17th. We got a condo in my old stomping grounds, for pretty damn cheap too. We'll stay there for 5 years(I was hoping more like 3, but whatever), then sell and perhaps move to LA. Though truthfully, I am more intrigued by actually making my own scripts into films than trying to shill them to uninterested parties who don't like anything they can't do themselves. We'll see how my first film goes, because that will go a long way into deciding my future. I understand the you have to be there to get in mentality, but not if you're actually making films. So amazingly, my focus has changed 180 degrees from a year ago where it was a far gone conclusion I was headed west immediately. Nothing to do now but shite or get off the potty.

Frightmare!

2006-01-18T01:41:00.000-05:00

The major theme of my film, Generator, is bound to be stolen soon. I got the idea from a little blurb in a newspaper about a year ago, but suddenly this gruesome act is in vogue. It's just a matter of time before someone hitches their screenplay to it. Me nervous.

And wouldn't that be a bite, woo, ah, missing a whole wrestling meet?

Smoke 'Em If You Got 'Em!

2006-01-16T17:40:00.000-05:00

A nitwit down here in Orlando decided he wanted fast food/Wendy's. He pulls in the drive thru, then falls asleep/passes out. They call the cops on him. When the police arrive, this guy wakes up and orders 5 cheese burgers. Much to his chagrin, they decided instead to give a him a field sobriety test. He failed that, then they searched his car and found cocaine and weed on his front seat.

Moral of the story? If you're that drunk, and you decide to drive, don't you have to do a few lines to keep you awake? Come on!

Camera Get

2006-01-15T02:02:00.000-05:00

The Panasonic appeared at my door on Thursday, and to be honest, I have no idea what I'm dealing with. I'm kind of timid with it, with all the customization that can be done. So I'm writing a short that I can film over a weekend. It's a nightmare I had for about a week straight a few months ago. A women is sitting on a grave stone in a cemetery, and I'm in the distance staring at her. She starts screaming at me with the most anguished face I've ever seen. But I can't hear her. Everything is silent. Then it's like everything is moving too slow. I start seeing everything in grey tones. I feel a presence behind me, but I'm too afraid to turn around.

I am suddenly in a bathtub. Someone opens the door to the bathroom and walks in, and it's me. I reach out, and there's blood running down my arm. The other me backs away horrified, I get a glimpse of me dead in the tub, or someone I think is me, almost like a camera flash. Then I wake up.

So, that is how I plan on testing out the camera.

A Side Gig

2006-01-11T01:19:00.000-05:00

I am now contributing to Horror Brain which is a semi new site devoted to horror films, and is a part of IGN, a rather huge gaming/everything under the sun site.

On Thursday, my first review will be up, which is for Seven Deaths In The Cat's Eye. On Friday, the 13th, I will be giving my blow by blow account of Hostel (with NO spoilers...I hate when reviewers give spoilers, whether they warn you or not). I may also throw in a review of Bay Of Blood, since the original Friday the 13th stole all 13 deaths from this underrated classic from Mario Bava. Give those youngsters a history lesson on good 'ol Friday the 13TH..

I've Been Tagged!

2006-01-10T16:28:00.000-05:00

Fun Joel did it. He reached out to the scribosphere and they responded. Dave over at Man Bytes Hollywood tagged William of This Savage Art, who in turn called me out. Here are my quick answers which I'm sure will change once I submit them:

ONE (1) earliest film-related memory:
Sneaking out of my bedroom when I was 5 to catch a glimpse of Magic, a horror film starring Anthony Hopkins and one scary knife toting ventriloquist dummy. My parents, along with my Aunt and Uncle were watching it on HBO, and I watched it right with them, without their knowledge, hiding my eyes now and again.

TWO (2) favorite lines from movies:

"Here's to five miserable months on the wagon, and all the irreparable harm it has caused me." The Shining

"I wanna be just like you. I figure all I need, is a lobotomy and some tights." The Breakfast Club

THREE (3) jobs youÂd do if you could not work in the ÂbizÂ:
1. Prog metal maestro
2. Football coach
3. Bounty Hunter

FOUR (4) jobs you actually have held outside the industry:
1. Construction worker/Carpenter
2. EA Sports Game Tester
3. Pizza Hut Delivery driver
4. Linen's N Things Backroom/Shipper

THREE (3) book authors I like:
1. Bret Easton Ellis
2. Anne Rice
3. Stephen King

TWO (2) movies youÂd like to remake or properties youÂd like to adapt:

1. I'd like to adapt the Poe Biography, Edgar A. Poe: Mournful and Never-ending Remembrance by Kenneth Silverman.

2. I'd like to adapt Tale of the Body Thief by Anne Rice.

ONE (1) screenwriter you think is underrated:

I think John Hughes is underrated. If you look at his writing credits in the 80's, and the fact that he wrote Ferris in 6 days and Breakfast 24 hours, it's obvious he was a very skilled screenwriter. Too many people lump him in with the horrible eighties, but he was so much more than the others. There's a reason his films hold up today, and I think it's because of his understanding of character interaction, and universal themes that will never die.

Dutch (1991)
Career Opportunities (1991)
Home Alone (1990)
Christmas Vacation (1989)
Uncle Buck (1989)
The Great Outdoors (1988)
She's Having a Baby (1988)
Planes, Trains & Automobiles (1987)
Some Kind of Wonderful (1987)
Ferris Bueller's Day Off (1986)
Pretty in Pink (1986)
Weird Science (1985)
European Vacation (1985) (also story)
The Breakfast Club (1985)
Sixteen Candles (1984)
Nate and Hayes (1983)
Vacation (1983)
Mr. Mom (1983)
Class Reunion (1982)

THREE (3) people I'm tagging to answer this meme next:
MovieQuill, Could You Describe The Ruckus?, The Wildwoods!

Horror Too Much For White Collar Corpses

2006-01-10T00:27:00.000-05:00

Listen to these nice comments about Hostel:

In a shocker that rivaled anything in the movie itself, Lionsgate's horror movie Hostel debuted at the top of the box office with an estimated $20.1 million over the weekend. It pushed the previous No. 1 film, Disney's The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch & the Wardrobe, which brought in about $15.4 million, into second place. Universal's King Kong dropped to third with about $12.5 million. The strong showing of Hostel, which played in only 2,195 theaters, left analysts aghast. "Hostel tops Narnia and we're all going to hell," headlined cinematical.com. The Associated Press described the box office results as "sheer torture." The British website monstersandcritics.com grudgingly remarked, "Not a bad bit of instant profit for a cheaply made splatter flick."

Horror gets no respect despite it's the easiest way to make a profit, and has been forever. Keep sending out your crappy Adam Sandler pics, your remakes and your Rom/Coms. You can spend under 1 million(Cabin Fever) and make a big chunk of change with a horror film. Get over it !

Blood And Guts-For A Fee

2006-01-08T13:30:00.000-05:00

I wrote a certain special FX/Makeup company about my film, and sent them the script. Here's the response email, with some funny FX shots described. The **** represents my editing, as I didn't want to give certain shots away.

Jason,
Thanks for sending me the script for "Generator". As a horror fan, I really enjoyed the plot, and was very intrigued by the effects involved in the film. I broke the script down into most of the effects I would need to fabricate. There are a lot of prop pieces that can be casted off of the actors, and others that can be bought easily and dressed. Below is a list of the effects I saw in the script.

Prosthetic Neck
Tubing
Fake Sledgehammer
Fake Wrist and Hand
Bruised girl
Platter of meat?
Statue's arms
Fake Head for **** Drilled ***
Body Parts
Mary Hexan - Swollen Eye Piece
Scalp props
Miscellaneous Guts
Fake Torso - Circular Saw
Fake Arm
Metal Poker Prop
Rotted Face In Plastic Bag
Vomit
**** Wound in Thigh
Fingers and Eyeballs Props
Scalp of Mary Hexan - Wig
Fake ******** Leg - Sawzall
Severed Foot In ****
Screwdriver to ***
Pickaxe to head - Fake Head
Hatchet dismemberment ** ******** **** **********
Dagger to ****** back
Pickaxe through ****** *** **********

If there are any that are being handled by art department or wardrobe, please let me know. I can provide all of the effects listed below by March for the pre-production cost of **** ******** dollars. My day rate on set is **** ******* dollars per 12 hours of shooting, and this includes on set supplies. If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to contact me. This sounds like an awesome script, and would love to be a part of it.

Thanks again for the opportunity.

********

Atmosphere Vs Plot

2006-01-02T21:47:00.000-05:00

Reading over my script for Generator, I can see how it may be underwhelming to readers. When I read it, I know in my head the shot, the lighting, the type of music...I have the finished project in my head. The story, or plot, is not a brand new one. Some of the scenes are a hodge podge, of a rehash, of some of my favorite films which I unwittingly emulated through my subconscious fandem. So when asked why did I choose this script to be my first film, I had to think about it. Was it the allure of knowing the horror audience so well? Was it that they will watch even the most ridiculous movies if they're entertaining, or gory, or both? Was it my bitterness and anger coming to a boiling point, and this is the spillage? I think a little of all these things led me to horror. I also think horror can be well represented even if it has no budget. The horror community is a forgiving one. We find the good in all the bad. And heap praise for effort. No other genre gets as many reprieves as horror, and I think it's because no other genre gets shit on more by the 'mainstream' than horror. So it's like being in a clique. We get it. You don't. And we're alright with that. I believe Eli Roth said it best on his solo commentary for Cabin Fever when he said, "If a horror film makes over $100 million, it's a thriller. And I think that's kind of bullshit. The Sixth Sense is horror. So is Silence of the Lambs." In other words, if it gains critical acclaim, and is accepted by the masses, the studios have such a bad connotation with horror, it immediately has to be repackaged under the horror pseudonym of thriller.

And I think that is bullshit. So anyway, back to plot vs atmosphere-I have decided that while the plot is solid, it's not all that mind blowing. There is no trick ending. It's a straight up 70's/80's style merge. I decided to use a Argento styled lighting scheme, such as Suspiria or Inferno. It's going to be draped in color. It's going to be draped in shadow. There are going to be long, steady tracking shots, and a lot of steadicam. No Mtv style here. More along the lines of Halloween and The Shining. I feel the atmosphere is most important. You take a slow buildup, with a unnerving atmosphere and score, and your success is almost assured. The plot is there, enough to warrant it's inclusion. But the movie itself is an experience I want people to feel. I don't need them to think and try to figure out the film. I just want them to feel like they may be next.

The World Is A Toilet Pt 2-The Nonbelievers Close To Home

2006-01-02T16:42:00.000-05:00

YOU ARE DELUSIONAL! So says my girlfriend. Nice huh? Apparently I am so out of touch with the real world that I just assume support for my movie. For instance, she thinks I'm assuming the location will be granted to me. How dare I! I do assume that since the location is my stepfathers business/warehouse. I'm delusional because I wrote in a house location patterned after my best friend of 20 years home. I do assume he would allow me to film there for a couple of weekends, but any home would do. I am quite delusional because making a film while working during the week will be too taxing on me. I am only going to be filming on Sundays, and the odd Sat. night. I don't think that will hurt me too much. She says nobody makes it in this business. Nobody makes it in this business if they don't have the drive and passion to continue at all costs. You can't be a General, or a leader when you're not paying people. I can if I inspire people to believe in the project. That's what a good General, or any leader for that matter, does-inspires.

In other words, I am going up a snow covered mountain with none of the fancy survival gear. Interesting...that's how I would have described my life prior to this endeavor.

The Panasonic DVX100A is mine!

2006-01-01T14:48:00.000-05:00

Bought it off a nice fellow from the DVXuser forums for $2100. Says it's in perfect condition, with low hours. We shall see. I saved about $1000, all told. I'm excited to get hands on with it. Next up-the Anamorphic adapter!

On another note, I was very depressed when I heard Dick Clark last night. He sounded awful, and has aged to...well...look his age. I hate mortality.

Happy Stinking Holidays!

2005-12-30T12:19:00.000-05:00

Ah, a 70 degree Christmas and New Years! This is really the only positive aspect of Florida living. But I have to say bye bye. I'm moving in a few weeks, and couldn't be happier. I once again am shopping for cameras. This time, I actually have the money allotted, and in the bank, so I am becoming quite anal as to which camera I want. I'm pretty much looking at 4 cameras-3 of which are Panasonic-the DVX100A, DVX100b and the HVX200. Along with the Canon XL2, they all have what I want, but at 3 wildly different prices. The Hvx is the best of everything, but the price is at the very least $5,999. In a pipedream, I could acquire this, but I have to be realistic-it would break me. So that's out. I like the DVX picture better than the Canon,and the Canon is $2,000 more, so Canon is out. What's left? Two Panasonic models which are essentially the same camera, but the 100B has several new updates/upgrades. It's about $500 to $1000 more than the 100A. I'm leaning toward the DVX100A and an anamorphic lens adapter so I can shoot in true widescreen. That combo would be about the same amount as the DVX100b alone. So, there you have it.

I also reinstated my internet access. Obviously.

Hiatus

2005-12-12T10:51:00.000-05:00

As you may have noticed, my updating has been quite lacking recently. So I'll fill you in on a few things before I depart for the next 2 weeks or so. I have made great progress with my story boards for Generator. I'm about 55% finished. I also have many new ideas for the movie which I'm excited about. Since I have a background in construction, I figured I should use what I know to my advantage. My old boss, who is married to my mother, has a huge work shop (which I'm shooting Generator in) He has lifts and cranes, bobcats and scaffolding. I have many camera angles in my head that can be acheived because of these 'weapons' and I plan on exhausting everything that resides at the warehouse. I want the camera to be on the move in almost every shot. Not MTV style, quick cutting garbage, but slow steady tracking shots and other moves like in The Shining and Halloween. So that's what's going on with Generator.

I cancelled my cable modem, and my internet 2 weeks ago, because I wasn't getting enough work done, hence my lack of updating. But in the last two weeks, I have several script ideas, watched and broke down my top 10 horror films(The Shining, Halloween, Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Evil Dead, April Fool's Day, Suspiria, The Thing, Black Christmas, The Wicker Man and...?) and tried to figure out why they work so well, and almost uniformly, they had three things in common-music, cinematography and a tense atmosphere. I of course found other similarities, but these three are my man concern. Blah blah blah.

Anyway, I hope everyone is doing well, and writing the next big independent hit. I'll see you soon.

Camden NJ On TV tonight!

2005-11-25T15:53:00.000-05:00

If anyone cares to take a gander at the human pile of feces that is Camden NJ, there's a feature on it tonight on that new Geraldo show on Fox, Geraldo At Large. It is a horrific place,(though there was an attempt to create a waterfront of upscale condos and stuff), and should be laid to waste as soon as possible. See for yourself!

I'm Back

2005-11-23T15:43:00.000-05:00

I have started immersing myself into Generator fully. And I also have begun the preliminary outlining of a cool little crime/drug film I will be able to shoot myself after Generator. So, I have been working, and working fairly consistently. I can't believe how many shots I have already for Generator. I was expecting somewhere around 200, but I'm above that number now, and I'm only half way.
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I listened to the commentary on Mean Streets, and it's among the best I've heard, with Scorsese talking about his early career and his influences. Very informative, and he shows a great admiration for it.
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Looks like I will being working at the post office again this holiday season. My feet were killing me last year. 12 hours standing on a concrete floor will do that. The money is fairly good, and a nice jolt of income for Christmas. I loathe it, of course, but I am moving in January, and this can only help me get going a little earlier.
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Katie bought us Billy Joel tickets for Philly in March. He's a favorite of mine because he was(and probably is) a drunk, bitter, angry young man in the 70's, and I relate well to his sarcasm. A lot of my friends didn't get the Billy Joel enjoyment, until I made them listen to the lyrics. A few actually began to like him, and a few didn't, but did understand why I had my huge Joel faze about 8 years ago. At any rate, I am excited, especially since that bum Elton won't be hogging the stage.
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Ah, the new idea I'm outlining is called GUPPY, and is a sort of throwback to the 70's type of revenge flicks, with a little organized crime in it to boot. Set in my South Jersey playground, which is not unaffected by having Philly 5 miles away, and NY 200 miles away. A lot of crime occurs in between those two cities, and most all of it I am privy to. A ton of mobsters actually live/lived nearby, like Nikki Scarfo and Gotti. And they had their hands in everything, including Ecstasy that kids sold to the ravers. And sometimes, a shady looking character would come and ask for the money...and well, it didn't take a genius to see to who and where the money was going. That's another reason I miss it up there...I was in the middle of everything, though I really didn't do any of it. You have Philly, and the beach, within a half hour of your home. Great fun. You have Camden for drugs, and mansions in Cherry Hill 5 miles from there. Anyway, Guppy is a very personal story, with a seemingly quiet suburban setting. But as we all know, underneath the gloss of silence, you have a million dirty little secrets.
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Speaking of Camden NJ, it was just voted the most dangerous city in America...again. I grew up within 10-20 miles of that place. I went there on drug runs...I was ripped off , or 'beat', as we called it. I went to the liquor stores at 4am because they stayed open when others were closed. (cops didn't enforce the law there) And yet, I never got into huge trouble there.

Lucky indeed.

A Little Update:

2005-11-12T13:53:00.000-05:00

Take a look at these upcoming releases, and tell me what you see(this is an actual list of movie news):

TOP NEWS
Hodder On 'Friday The 13th' Remake

Donnie Wahlberg On 'Silence'

'Masters of Horror' Set Visit

'Black Christmas' Remake

Miner To Direct 'Day of the Dead' Remake

Jackson Comes At 'King Kong' Anew

Adam Baldwin In 'Thirst'

'The Hills Have Eyes' Remake Pics

Wray's Spirit Lives In 'King Kong'

'Castlevania' Movie

Carmen Electra back for Scary Movie 4

At Least I'm Not Swinging A Hammer!

2005-11-08T21:20:00.000-05:00

Before I get to this totally enlightening post, I want to state that I will be showing this Francis Ford Coppola pic on every entry until I don't feel exactly like that.

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I am basically treading water down here in Florida. I have no cohorts down here. I have no money. I have no drive except the one that tells me to get out of here. I'm basically living in a sloth like state. Ideas come and go, yet I stare into space. "Do I want to start a project?" "What's the point?" Of course, I do want to take this on like a job, but I feel very out of sort with knowing I'm moving and making a film up in NJ, and it's contrasting with my anemic life down here to kind of leave me floating somewhere in purgatory. Which way do I go? I just feel I'm being distracted from my work with other concerns. I think I should just focus on Generator, and finish everything I can with regards to that film. Be totally prepared for the shoot. Make a budget sheet, finally finish my stinking storyboards and stuff like that. But it's that writer in me who is balking at this idea. "You don't write, you cease to be a writer! Muhahahaha!" I am so paranoid when I'm not writing. I feel like by not writing every single day, I am wasting away. That was the main problem with me storyboarding. I thought of it as beneath my writing. (Not being able to draw worth a lick has something to do with it too) I should just whip myself back into shape and realize that Generator should be first and foremost. A lot depends on it.

And maybe that's the real problem I'm having-knowing that my entire life depends on making this, or else I'm a failure. I left everything behind in order to make movies-my job, my family, my girlfriend, my friends-and maybe I'm just afraid of taking that last step to where there is no turning back. Where I am forced to run the show, keep paperwork in order, make cuts, direct actors, stay up editing at night, dealing with the disappointment when something doesn't work, buying the equipment-doing all this, and then finding out my film sucks...and being devastated.

I have to fight through this growing malaise and fucking focus.

Just Some Ramblings

2005-11-05T12:16:00.000-05:00

I don't mind misleading advertising. In fact, since I expect it, I kind of laugh at it from time to time, thinking "Who in their right mind would believe this garbage?" So when I see the commercials for Trading Spouses (all of last week until I couldn't take it anymore), which aired this past Wednesday, I thought the show looked outrageous. The lady was screaming and ranting on and on. And so I had to see it. So, I tune in and watch the first ten minutes, and all is okay. Then before going to the first commercial, they show the fanatic footage that I'm tuning in for, and say "Stay Tuned because this is coming before the split", which means before they go back to their regular families. So I tune in. The second part is mildly humorous, and then the commercial break comes, and again, they tout what's coming up, which is the flipping out. So again, I stay tuned. This happens two more times at the commercial breaks. Then the show ends, and they say Tune in next week for part 2, so you can see this, and shows the woman flipping out.

It was a two parter! Now listen, I'm not one to berate advertisers since I understand it has to be done, but this is just ...dirty. I have no problems with those advertisements before the show to get people to tune in. But during the show, in which they know it's not in that episode? That is a very unethical practice, in my opinion. You have already gathered an audience through the pre air date commercials, so you're going to keep lying to the audience while they're watching? Good God, I was infuriated! Is it just me, or is that over the line? I have never watched a show where the in episode advertisements were for the next show. Fucking horseshit!

At any rate, I am not tuning in for the second part this coming Wednesday. In fact, I will download it for free and watch it at my leisure. So screw you!

----------------
Had a few things going down on the writing front. Seems I jumped the gun on Kill 'Em All. I have the idea and everything, but something kept calling me back to my unfinished script, "The Last Party". I figured I should finish that, since it may be the second film I will actually shoot this year. So KEA is on hold for now while I finish something I think will further my career, which is making my own film. Am I wrong in thinking it's more important for me to write and shoot my scripts, instead of writing and entering contests and trying to send them out to agents ? Anyway, I added 5 pages off the top of my head to "The Last Party", and I hate that title, by the by. Especially since it's in use for some crappy horror movie, I think. So there you have it-I'm writing my second feature that I will shoot myself. I might actually shoot this one first, just to get everyone comfortable with acting and taking direction from me. Plus this script is a comedy, so it'll be a nice warmup for us.

----------------

It seems that if I had any connections at all, April Fool's Day 2 might have had a chance. There are now almost 5 horror movies that have an uncanny resemblance to my script, and it pisses me off that they get released, yet mine languishes behind, even though I had the idea 3 or 4 years ago, and wrote the first outline 2 1/2 to 3 years ago. In the last year, at least 3 of those movies have received good reviews for being original and fun. Which frankly, is a good old fashioned kick in the gonads to me. My script is collecting dust while these half assed scribes are getting my fucking pub. There is still a chance of course, but I have to turn to drastic measures with the end result being burning a few bridges. The problem is, I don't know if they're still standing anyway...and I may never know.

The whole thing is just bizzare. This manager/agent, in responding to a stern email I sent him(Unintentionally stern, believe it or not), said he would stop trying and I could get someone else if I wished, but that he was very interested in pursuing this. It doesn't seem that way to me. I haven't heard one thing from him since, besides a confirmation email saying he received my 3rd draft. I have no idea what to do. He doesn't return calls, but I've found that nobody does, so that's not all that unusual. My bigger problem lies in the fact that he doesn't respond to my emails. I mean, to me, it isn't all that hard to say "Nothing yet", and goodbye. But then again, I don't know the business.

So, to make this seem shorter, I have the producers phone number and business address. I'm going to call and see if I can't get my script in front of him. Of course, they don't take unsolicited material, but I may drop a name or two, since I now have nothing to lose.

So there you have. I'm in a perpetual state of purgatory, and have nowhere to go but...well...up or down, I guess.

Kill 'Em All!

2005-11-02T17:05:00.000-05:00

My new screenplay adventure is one I have thought on for a long time. I first had the idea of doing a western after seeing The Wild Bunch and Once Upon A Time In The West. Prior to seeing those two classics, I had not been a western fan at all. I loathe John Wayne movies. In fact, the only western I have ever enjoyed was The Unforgiven. After seeing both TWB and OUaTITW, I realized why that genre never appealed to me-it was too cookie cutter. The cowboys were clean and righteous, and the bad guys always got their comeuppance. The Unforgiven included a theme of revenge, of doing something that was just, not necessarily morally right.

Enter The Wild Bunch. (Now, this is my personal examination of the film, and what it signified to me. I have read no expert breakdown of the symbolism of The Wild Bunch.) To me, the movie meant the assassination of the ideology of that old west mentality, and mythology. It's quite clear to the crew early on that they are going to end up dead. So when they wander into that town with that famous shot (above), they do so with the knowledge that the west of the old is over, and so are they. It's almost a suicide mission, for the genre, and for the characters. So that's my half assed interpretation of The Wild Bunch, which as far as I feel like going presently, because this all leads to....

Kill 'Em All. My new script jaunt. It's a psuedo western, or a neo western, or a damn bloodbath, who the hell knows for sure?-but one thing I definitely know- it's extremely nihilistic in tone. This will be a bleak story, with some macabre humor. It will be revenge, loneliness, hatred..but most of all, it will be greed. I have the pictures in my head of the key scenes, which means it's time to begin the process. So finally, I can breathe again. Finally, I am not wasting my time. Finally, I can say I'm a writer. And finally, I can feel I have a purpose.

At least until I finish the first draft, in which case I feel like a complete worthless shit again.

Like This Should Surprise Me, But...

2005-11-01T19:26:00.000-05:00

Black Christmas and Day of the Dead are both set for remakes. Fantastic news from the land of idiots.

There is no end to this. People always argue with me, saying that this has always been how Hollywood operates. But I'm telling anyone who will listen, this is unprecedented. There are literally dozens of remakes in the pipeline for the next year or two. It's so disheartening being a writer/director these days. Sometimes I wonder if I should just throw in the towel.

Frustration level is very f'n high. Especially since I haven't embarked on a new script in two months. Time to let my anger flow, ladies and gents.

***UPDATE***
Jump for joy, little ones! The Hills Have Eyes....remade!!!! Good Lord, it justs gets worse and worse.

Boo! A Scare For You!

2005-10-31T15:12:00.000-05:00

I happened upon this*** 9/11 proof one night while I was researching the Illuminati at 4 in the morning. Needless to say, it's really eerie, and even frightening to see that these playing cards show, without doubt, what happened on 9/11. Problem is, this ***game was released in 1995! Say what you will about conspiracies, but in some cases we should really take notice that people mocking conspiracy theories are playing directly into the hands of the conspirators. I happen to be into conspiracy theory, but am rather rooted in reality as well. I'm more of a 'where there's smoke, there's fire' person. This seems pretty scary to me.

Not only that, but a day after the attacks, a friend showed me how you could fold our paper money into pictures of the attack. The one dollar bill can be folded so the back shows the twin towers standing. The five dollar bill can be folded to show the twin towers hit by the words united and america(or american, the two airlines that actually hit them. (Off memory, I believe I'm correct so far) The ten dollar bill shows the towers burning, complete with a person falling out of one tower. The twenty dollar bill shows a pile of rubbish, no towers. Now just as weird as it is alone, what makes it even more unsettling is how this information came to fruition the very next day. Seems like it was leaked online. But by who? I find it hard to believe someone was fiddling around with a 5 dollar bill, and just fell upon this.

***(I checked the game site, and these cards appear to be the real deal)

***disclaimer-I know there is a religious slant to this, but if you actually read it, and look at the cards, it proves pretty interesting, even with the heavy handed end paragraph***

A last thought for the day: Have you ever considered the classics, 1984, A Brave New World and Animal Farm were not the cautionary tales they're made out to be, but a blue print for what was going to happen? Aldous Huxley, writer of A Brave New World, was very steeped in the illuminati tradition. He was turored by none other than Aleister Crowley, occultist and satanist, who of course had infamous relations with the Illuminati. So, perhaps Huxley had some insider knowledge, and was not a prophet, but a messenger for the NWO.

All Cats Are Grey

2005-10-27T01:02:00.000-04:00

I am at a standstill with what to pursue next. I have a few ideas, but none spark my interest so far. I'm in that grey area where I am anticipating actually shooting my first feature in the coming months(and documenting it day to day here), but I also know I have to do something more active, rather than just wait for that shooting date to come. I wish I could just sleep until about February, then wake up with my Panasonic and start shooting. I am so pumped up to get that movie going...it's hard to concentrate on anything else.

I am also scouting for locations for another horror idea I have. The problem is, I need to know about availability of these two places I want to shoot at. I want to write my script specifically for either place. So it's imperative I actually find out the cost(for Byberry mental hospital in Philly, which has been closed for 15 years), or what permits will be needed(for filming in the Pine Barrens in South Jersey), if any, to begin. If I do get any word on either place, I will write a second feature to shoot immediately after Generator. Maybe even make it a trilogy of films, who knows?

Too ambitious? There's no such thing in my mind.

If Only You Had A Brain

2005-10-24T12:23:00.000-04:00

This just in! Jason vs Freddy vs Michael Myers confirmed! (Yawn)...Well, this doesn't bother all that much. Sure it won't be horror, but at least it's not a remake. On the other hand, it also was semi-announced that Friday the 13th is being remade. Followed by the entire series. Why remake every Friday film? Oh, I remember-because we are so damn stupid we'll go see anything. I can't blame the studios anymore, as much as I like to. The Fog remake debuts at #1...and got torn apart from every angle prior to it's release-yet some numbskull doesn't like to watch people in outdated clothing, so he refuses to see the original. The stupidity in this country is just disgusting. I am so sick of writing original material, and seeing more and more remakes. It really is like a dagger to my gut. And I don't mean to say that everything I write is gold-I'm saying if it is, nobody would ever know. There needs to be some sort of farm system for unproduced writers. Maybe have it connected with schools. Or better yet, just make a school that serves as the minor leagues where the big boys can pick and choose from an allotment of new writers. Something has got to give.

I mean really, if this doesn't tell you Hollywood if stagnant, nothing will. How hard can it be to write a new Friday chapter? I mean, Jesus, throw some teens in the damn mountains this time...it's still better than a remake. How about overseas? Jason in Japan? All you need are new settings. How about a prequel? But no, we want to remake an entire series of films...that seems much more logical.

And you idiots will go make each film number 1.

I Have Made A Huge Mistake

2005-10-21T16:02:00.000-04:00

I am beginning to find where I fit in terms of story telling. I am a dark human being that finds laughs in some naughty, dirty, bloody places. Yet, I still try to bend my enthusiasm for the Horror/Dark Comedy genre into others to fulfill some type of make believe portfolio I feel I'll need to exhibit to some suited up jerkoff from a Production company you never heard of. I try to outline my Western, it turns apocalyptic, and a free for all blood bath. I try a Rom/Com, but it turns out the reason they get together is to go on a Bonnie and Clyde type rampage, leaving hundreds of bodies in their wake, before exchanging bloody kisses and offing themselves in front of police. I write a coming of age story about a serial killer. I write a short story about a man whose penis is too large, and he is shunned from society(Gargantuman!). He resorts to hookers, since he believes they won't be frightened away..but they are..and he becomes...well, you know the rest.

So there's my problem. I am trying different things, not content with writing horror, but I end up there anyway. Perhaps I need to just accept what I am...a Horror/Black Comedy writer. I don't like to be pigeonholed, especially by my own hand, yet I have to wonder if this isn't how many horror greats start? I mean, does John Carpenter know he is that type of writer? Stephen King? Wes Craven? Dario Argento? They all have done other types of films, especially earlier in their career, yet they seem to flourish when they stay in horror. I wonder if you are what you are is an apt saying?

The bottom line is, should I try and change, or is being so into one genre a bad thing? Maybe I just belong in the dark dankness and not the lightness of happy pappy films? It's a tough process ripping out your soul and finding it's exactly what you knew it was, and nothing more.

And Don't Let The Door Hit Ya In The Ass

2005-10-20T11:49:00.000-04:00

It appears I can't move soon enough as hurricane Wilma looks like a direct hit. I lucked out all this year after being bombarded last year, and now this has to happen a mere two months before I move. Fan-friggin-tastic!

Adapting A Novel

2005-10-13T15:33:00.000-04:00

I just finished reading American Psycho(Bret Easton Ellis), and thoroughly enjoyed it. It's definitely not for the faint of heart. The reader is basically put into the head of a madman, and gets bombarded with the constant musings of Patrick Bateman, in all their obsessive and gore soaked glory.

Anyway, I always have loved American Psycho, the movie. I consider it a dark comedy, and to that effect, it succeeds. Most who don't like it seem to think of it as either a) Psychological thriller or b) a Horror film. But I believe taken as a dark comedy, it delivers constant laughs. Of course, if you're not into dark comedy, this will have little effect on whether you like it or not-you'll hate it.

So having said all that, it was with great eagerness that I dove into the novel 4 days ago. In the early going, it was a tough read. It was very difficult to get the perspective down because there are thoughts, dialogue, sentences from characters that go on with no reply, run on sentences...ect. However, once you get accustomed to it, by chapter 2 or 3, it makes for a more comfortable ride. And what a ride. This is a brutally violent book. I mean just plain nasty, and Ellis spares no details, no matter how small(In fact, that goes for the entire book). Each incision is noted graphically, and I have to warn that the book is one hundred times as brutal as the movie. Maybe one thousand times. And it's also pretty damn funny. Which brings me (finally) to the adaptation job of Mary Harron and GuinevereTurner. The sheer amount of information they had to sift through is just mountainous. What they did is combine multiple characters into one, put some of Batemans narratives/monologues over some of the main action, killing two birds with one stone. There is a steady stream of narrative from Bateman, and it's too much for a film, but they picked and pieced together their own narrative from Batemans seemingly most important thoughts. Since they couldn't show the dozens of murders, they had him rather ingeniously go into detail for each killing mentioned in the book in his confession to his lawyer. In the book, his confession is much shorter, but in the movie, he goes on and on about a mans body rotting in a "bath tub of acid in Hell's Kitchen", and many other's. Of course, in the book, we read that he actually did all of those things while he's doing them, but in a film, trying to condense 400 pages into 100 pages, some things just won't fit. So he slyly mentions each one(most) from the book while he's on the phone. I thought that was a nice touch.

And the amazing job Harron and Guinevere did extracting the relevant information to tell the same story, but in a hyper condensed form is simply stunning. I can't even fathom how I would have done it. Where would I start? Go one chapter at a time and outline the info I want to use? It seems to me I would still come up with far too much.

So, I guess what I'm trying to say is, American Psycho is a great study for those who are thinking on adapting a novel into screenplay format. It's a fine example, or a how-to, to say the least.

Now They've Done It

2005-10-11T01:26:00.000-04:00

Halloween is being remade! What's next? Indiana Jones? Jaws? The Godfather? Is nothing sacred?

They Dumbed Down My Show, Damn Them

2005-10-05T05:22:00.000-04:00

If anyone watches Arrested Development, you're familiar with it's brilliant sharp tongued quips and character interaction that is often unleashed at a frenzied pace. You're also aware that the ratings sucked the first two seasons, despite several Emmy Nominations, and a few wins.

I bought the season 1 DVD set, and it's one of the funniest seasons of any show, ever. I know season 2 is just as funny, if not moreso, if that's even possible. Well, imagine my shock when the first 3 episodes of the third season were noticeably lacking in the laughs category. Don't get me wrong, I laughed enough. But the non-stop stream of intelligent dialogue is gone. It's more deliberately paced, with a lot less of it. Which brings me to the other change-the narration from Ron Howard. It's as though there are longer lapses between narrations this season, and they are more about what's happening on screen then ever before, and in fact did something that really annoyed me. Jason Bateman(Michael Bluth) was saying something about "american males being in a perpetual state of Arrested Development"(get it?), and Ron Howard quips "Hey, that's the name of the show!". What?! What have they done to my show?!

Then I realized the dilemma of AD.

In order to stay on TV, AD has to get better ratings. But it's too smart a show to drag in the masses who'd rather watch King Of Queens, or any other laugh track induced yuck fest full of punch lines. AD never told outright jokes for laughs. It had much in common with Seinfeld, and Curb Your Enthusiasm in this regard. It relied on wit and situations. And some massive innuendo. It appears they have dumbed it down with the hopes it can gain viewers. Unfortunately, it won't gain them, it'll lose them. I understand the rationale, strictly on a survival plain, but isn't it better to go out on top after three seasons than to have a mediocre third season, and flame out?

Here's hoping the season picks up steam, and gets that bite back.

Thanks To Mr. August

2005-09-30T22:43:00.000-04:00

For this wonderful quiz: Political quiz

I ended up being a 'Centrist' and the Pope...???? Which means I pretty much agree with both sides on some things, and disagree with them on others....that's the way I like it. And I'm a pope...yay!

I have to disagree with John August and his assessment that anyone who voted strongly agree with "People shouldn't be allowed to have children they can't provide for.". is saying they want more government proposed regulations... I meant it as common sense....they shouldn't be allowed to have children that they can't provide for...

Been Busy....Thinking Why I'm Not Busy

2005-09-30T19:13:00.000-04:00

Here's a partial update:

I find that if I'm left to my own devices, and don't have someone else in the house, I become an even bigger recluse than I normally am...plus I procrastinate more now than ever. I guess I used writing to escape criticism from Katie for 'doing nothing', so I would take out my anger in a more constructive manner, by writing. Now that I don't have that, I am languishing behind my preferred pace. In a month, I wrote 3 screenplays. Since then, none.

So it comes down to this: I need someone pushing me, questioning me, and making me mad, or I am just another dumb white man. I have a weird kind of muse thing going, apparently. I need supervision. If I don't have it, my mind suffers long lapses of nothingness.

On the docket:

Join me next time as I make a huge confession-I don't know how to do a rewrite.

She's Gone! (She's gone) Oh I...(Oh I) I Better Learn How To Face....Err, Um..

2005-09-26T00:12:00.000-04:00

Katie, my girlfriend has moved back to the homeland, NJ, and left me to fend for myself. Great! I miss her already. She does so much around here, and now I'm going to see just how much. Writing is going to have to take a backseat until I get up there at the end of October, what with getting a new job and all that crap. I have to work some real hours until then so we can be situated. Miss you Katie!

The thing is, I'm already feeling guilty about not writing, even though I've been slacking off anyway. Maybe I'll try and scribble ideas down and start them upon my return home. I think Hellfire is out of the question too. I don't have $30 to spare, I can't spare a square.

Looks like it's just me and my preproduction of Generator to tide me over.

Surely, I accept your condolences...

It's A Small World...Of Losers

2005-09-24T21:31:00.000-04:00

I have been using the term ridiculi for years now...just because I liked how it sounded, and never heard anyone else say it. Ever. I do tend to make up my own vocabulary on the fly. Something just strikes my fancy, and I just throw it out there.

Imagine my surprise when I visited the Urban Dictionary, and found my word in there?! RIDICULI

How dare they! I am so brilliant, that I came up with this monstrosity of a word, and they've stolen it!

But seriously, if you ever wonder if your idea is the only one of that sort at any given time, at any place, forget it. We all talk, think and speak the freaking same. Nothings original. Which is a scary thought, since we're supposed to be creating story's.

It appears to me, it's all a race to see who can get their identical ideas out there first. Like this, for instance: POE

I was hard at work, thinking how I was going to write my Edgar Allan Poe bio pic. I was knee deep in my minds outline, ready to put pen to paper when I stumbled across this massacre. I love Poe, and really wanted to write about him. I thought, There can't be another soul out there doing a Poe script. The guys been dead for about 160 years...what are the odds someone would finally devise the perfect idea for a film? Well, there you have it. And what are the frigging odds it would be Sly Stallone? Ugh....

If These People Are Commies, Sign Me Up!

2005-09-23T23:13:00.000-04:00

Stars' Communist Files Revealed
Late screen siren Marilyn Monroe was a suspected communist and tracked by the FBI. Newly-released documents reveal Monroe was just a number of stars the Federal Bureau of Investigation kept files on - including John Lennon, Frank Sinatra, The Beach Boys, Louis Armstrong, Albert Einstein, Lucille Ball and Liberace. The Some Like It Hot actress was targeted after she applied for visa to visit Russia. She was then tracked meeting a communist group during a holiday to Mexico organized by Sinatra. Sinatra aroused suspicion because the FBI were tipped off he had attended sex parties with President John F. Kennedy. Lennon was added to the list when agents deduced he planned to disrupt the Republican National Convention in 1973, but struck him off because his drug habits rendered him incapable of being a revolutionary.

A History Of Violence

2005-09-23T02:46:00.000-04:00

On September 23rd, 1973, somewhere around 4:30 am, I was born.

Interestingly enough, at around 12:30 am, on September 23rd, 1973, my Mother watched Rosemary's Baby and her water promptly broke. How's that for a sign?

I have my fathers eyes!

Now, if only I could have been named Damien....

Posting Extravaganza (Because I'm Drunk And It's 2:40 AM!)

2005-09-23T02:34:00.000-04:00

Anyone enjoy Moonlighting? I just recently purchased seasons 1&2, and I love 'em. I used to watch it back when I was maybe 12-13. I thought Addison was hilarious then, and I think it now, too.

But one thing has me puzzled. What kind of kid was I, watching Moonlighting? It doesn't seem I was the target demographic. Come to think of it, I watched Cheers at that time to. Maybe it's the humor-both shows had the cocky/sarcastic male lead in Sam Malone and David Addison. Maybe it's the promise of relationship-and denial of said relationship- in both-Maddie and David, Sam and Diane? The game, if you will. But why the hell would that interest me when I was 12?

Dammit mom, you had to make me watch Luke and Laura on General Hospital, didn't you?! That must be it. Too much female supervision. Oh well. Maybe it just reflects my polished sense of humor? Yes, that's it.

I Want To Crack Open The County Clerks Windpipe

2005-09-23T01:45:00.000-04:00

Remember that post I wrote about how Katie caused me to get three tickets? No? Well, that doesn't matter, I guess. But here's the end result, and some would say expected result. Which is really a shame.

The only ticket that would put points on my license was the illegal U-turn. And I'll be damned, a state which is pretty much thunderdome in terms of driving rules decides to nab me for an illegal u-turn at the only spot in Winter Park/Orlando where an illegal u-turn exists. Drivers down here are completely reprehensible. But anyway, instead of taking the points, I paid less of a fine, and had to take a 4 hour online traffic course within 90 days of payment. Since I had three different tickets, and paid them at different times, I became confused. To make this long story shorter, I was late by 5 days.

So there I am today, at the Orange County Courthouse, waiting in a humid, urine soaked, room with three people helping 100. After 45 minutes, finally, the grumpy wench summons me to her cave. I show her my certificate for the successful completion of the most inane class ever recorded. She immediately blows it off. "You're late, and now you owe money." I giggle. Not the ha ha type of giggle. The "I may impact your semi-retarded smirk with my palm" variety. But I sit silently as she types my info into her Commodore 64. (seriously, with all these rip off fines, they can't buy new computers? Or how about buying actual employees? Arrrrg!)

She glances up at me, and says "That'll be 43.80." I look and ask politely, "Nothing can be done here? It was a mistake, and it's only 5 days later. I already payed $30 for this certificate." I am almost interrupted, almost, with "No sir. The state won't accept it. It's right here on the computer." I cackle a little more mean spirited this time. I say "Why do we need you? The computer does all the work." She grunts under her breath. I smirk like Ted Bundy at a freshman girl. "Will you be paying with cash or charge?" I respond, "No, and No." She says, "The process of license suspension will begin then." She hands me my meaningless certificate back. I walk out, ready to pummel my misfortune into someone's liver.

I am now down $50, and have 2 points on my license. And have to try for insurance in NJ. If you have never heard about NJ car insurance, let me tell you, it's the biggest swindle this side of ...I don't know, I don't fall for scams, but it's surely tops the list in the very very corrupt state of NJ.

Time To Pop Out A Baby

2005-09-22T21:00:00.000-04:00

Hellfire is holding a short horror script contest, in which the top 4 are melded into a DVD film, ala Creepshow. They recommend 20 pages. I'm ready to rummage through my smaller ideas that I haven't fleshed out into full fledged screenplays yet and cram out an entry just before the deadline, which is the 30th, if I'm not mistaken.

Go enter now! (you should be writing anyway!)

DeathDay Nears!

2005-09-20T14:19:00.000-04:00

I have a very uneventful Birthday coming up. My 32nd. I know, I can hear everyone going "He's 32? He acts like a child!". (I do consistently get carded, so there's a feather in my cap)Well, that's only half true. I am a big kid, no doubt about that. But I'm also not immature, in a juvenile sense. I've met some guys in their 40's who I actually feel embarrassed for, because they act like infants. So, I am not of that variety. I am a definite Gen. X'er, if that even exists. I don't do anything in the way of the generation before me. My parents, and all my friends parents were married by the time they were 23, at the latest. All had kids by their mid twenties, and thought they had careers. It appears to me, they had jobs. And while my Mother and I consistently fight about what begin an adult means, I can sum it up in one sentence-be happy with what you do. My entire family had miserable, some well paying, jobs. They taught me that you suck it up, do what you hate, simply to make ends meet. No thanks.

I told my grandparents that I won't do anything I don't at least have an interest in. And I mean it. I quit my construction job of 7 years because it wasn't for me, and I knew it wasn't, for 7 years. And while my family tosses the word 'bum' or the more hip 'slacker ' around to describe me,(or is that paranoia?) I laugh in their face. I have no children. No car payment. No mortgage. No marriage. (much to Katie's chagrin) In other words, no big responsibilities that can tie me down to any place I may be residing at any specific time. I am responsible only for me. If I fail with writing, I won't be unhappy. I will die knowing I did everything I wanted, not what has been dictated to me.

Sure, I can hear the eyes roll. "Who does this punk think he is?" Well, that's sort of the answer, I am a punk in some regards. (Definition? A young person, especially a member of a rebellious counterculture group.) That is me. I make movies, write, Or Die Trying. Cheers to all you trailblazers and trendsetters!

So here we are, fast approaching my 32nd year, and I suddenly feel very happy about it.

Busy Doing Nothing, Or Something...

2005-09-19T00:23:00.000-04:00

I must have the Summer burn out. I just don't have the fire to blog right now. I have my move coming up in a month or so, plus I'm intermittently doing my Generator Storyboards. Plus trying to find a new script to begin so that I won't be a miserable prick anymore.

So, since I am the laziest man alive right now, I will ask a question: On a desert island,(with a generator, tv and DVD player) you are allowed 5 DVDs. What do you bring, and why?

Mine are as follows:

1. The Breakfast Club-Rarely has a movie left me feeling so satisfied, for so long. I first watched this movie on VHS in about '87. I was enthralled with the hilarious back and forth dialogue, which was more intelligent than usual 'teen film' fare. The interaction of the characters was great. Some say they were stereotypical characters, but that was the point in the beginning of the film. By the end, they are all the same-lost teen agers. And it holds up very well for me, still being one of my favorite films.

2. The Shining-This is a must watch for me. It moves at a snails pace, and I love it. The camera slowly reveals things were not sure we're ready for. The music grates on the frayed end of each nerve, adding to the building tension. And we have an Oscar worthy performance from Nicholson. The scene with the bartender alone makes this disc worthy of inclusion.

3. Divorce, Italian Style-I have yet to see a dark comedy meet the standard of this one. It is hysterical, and plain awful. One of the funniest movies I have ever seen.

4. Pulp Fiction-I almost went with True Romance, but this is the pinnacle movie in QT's career thus far. I enjoy quoting it the most too. Any movie that has a line: "Oh shit, I shot Marvin in the face" is alright in my book.

5. Casino-It was tough for me to pick a Scorsese film and not take one of the three elite-Taxi Driver, Raging Bull or Goodfellas. But I find Casino more enjoyable, although a step down from those overall. I just think it's endlessly watchable. Faults and all.

Honorable mentions: High Fidelity, Deep Red, Clerks, Boogie Nights, Fright Night, April Fools Day, Magnolia, Fight Club, Mulholland Drive, The Game.

I Have Seen The Future, And It Is The Past

2005-09-16T01:19:00.000-04:00

Download and watch the video. Then bow down. REVOLUTION IS NEAR

Why Don't You Justify My Foot Up Your Ass?

2005-09-15T08:45:00.000-04:00

Q: Justify why this is blue? A: Because there's a blue gel over the light!>>>

That's one of the last things I remember saying in film school. We had a fairly useless lighting lab. It was all technique, and no creativity, as usual. It could be argued that's all film school students are tech geeks sans any creativity whatsoever, but I don't think so. The problem lies with the instructors. They don't allow for creativity to bleed into their tried and true formulas.

I have had many an argument about the lighting I like to showcase in my films. I don't feel I need to justify every light shown on screen. The dogma says differently. They tell you, every light must obviously come from something on screen, or off screen, but the viewer must subconsciously say, "Oh, that soft light is coming from the street lamp just off screen". Me, being a huge fan of Lynch and Argento, vehemently deny this rule. It has a place, yes. But I feel if I want to bathe my film in red light, I should be able to do so. It's a stylistic choice. I like surreal images. I enjoy that disorienting feeling I first got when I watched Suspiria, or The Lost Highway. I don't believe it takes people out of the film, I believe it transplants them further into a dream like state. They become fully immersed in their perceived surroundings. Of course, if the movie blows, the lighting will be ripped apart. But if the movie sucks, it sucks. Period. So what's the difference?

If I'm filming a comedy, then perhaps the rule applies. I doubt my lighting style would work for any movies that are comedic in tone. But I know that. That's not the point. I feel the lighting is another tool filmmakers can use to draw people into the story, and I think it's under utilized because Directors are so worried about "How can I justify this blue light?". I think of films as an escape. Why can't I make my spot more unconventional, more surreal, for tourists?

Kung Fu Monkey- A Pro

2005-09-14T22:04:00.000-04:00

Just updated my links to show Mr. Rogers aka Kung Fu Monkey, is now under Pros/Resources, where he should of been many months ago. I hadn't really noticed until a few days ago. So, Mr Rogers, I have rectified the situation that I'm sure you never knew existed, or probably didn't care about anyway.

But I like your blog, so there you go...

And no, I am not kissing ass. I only link to blogs I like, hence my low link count. There are thousands of others I spit on, but that's neither here nor there...

Stupid &!^%&** Storyboards & Other Inane Conjecture

2005-09-14T14:12:00.000-04:00

I'll admit it-the storyboarding is kicking my ass right now. I just feel like I'm getting nowhere. I'm at page 20 in the script, and have, like 60 storyboards already. Ugh! But now I'll calm myself, and pass along this: It is undeniably cool to be drawing out your own movie, page by page. I close my eyes, picture the scene, then sketch what I imagine.(well, try to...my skills are dead...as dead) It's kind of nice to flip through and take a gander at every shot in my film, just like I intended them. And in the end, it's going to make my work a breeze. "Shot 21 E! Lets go!". I glance down at shot 21-E, and I'll be damned, there it is, camera angle and everything. Then I go and shoot it. "Next!"

Of course, it'll be harder than that. But the fact is, if you're going to make your own movie, you have to make it as easy as possible-on yourself. Just running the camera and directing is going to be work enough. I may even have to do the lighting, which, to be honest, I really am not a fan of. I'm good at it, and understand the typical three light set-up(which I will not be using), I know all about HMI's, and I even know what barn doors are, and their function. But I tell you one thing-it's much to analytical, tedious, and time consuming for me to have to worry about. So I would love to find a lighting dude to help me out. (hint hint) I plan on getting an FXs guy, and maybe a composer, though I'd like to do the music myself. I have this dream of bass guitar and double bass drums for my entire soundtrack. It sounds awesome in my head. Probably sounds awful to everyone else. But hey, you can't understand it until you hear it, so back off! Auteur at work! ..... So....where was I?

Ah, yes, making things easier on yourself/myself. Add to all the above the fact that I'm asking these 'actors' to work for virtually nothing but maybe a meal (and beer!), and you see what we're dealing with here. The shit can hit the fan at any moment. The shoot I'm looking at will be over a few months time. It will also be overnight shoots. Perhaps 10pm-4am, with initial setup starting at 830pm. Put two and two together, and it equals problems. Actor one can't show up tonight? "Night's over! Everyone go home! I'll see you 7 days from today! Please, nobody cut their hair, shave or suddenly put on 10 pounds!" And that's why I have to delegate as many positions as possible. We're talking a 3 year voyage if I have to do it all. Just having people around me to take on responsibilities that I would prefer to do myself, but obviously can't, will help me get this film done in time for Fall '06, and the horror movie film fests.

And isn't making a film all we really want to accomplish, directly, or indirectly, anyway? Once you do that, the sky's the limit as far as I'm concerned. I even have another film I want to do immediately after Generator. So basically, my next 3 years, I want to film two features, back to back, and see what comes of them. Then, I'll judge the fallout, and decide if I'm worthy to move to the City Of Angels. I'll still be relatively young in three years. Plus, what if I accomplish more with Generator than I expect? (Who am I fooling? I know it'll be great..and I'm not just saying that) What if it finds distribution? Straight to DVD? Wins a prize at a film festival? Any of these situations can change my outlook for the better. Which is why I'm doing it. I don't expect an Oscar.(For Generator, that is*) I expect to make a kick ass genre film. And I think that's a fair expectation.

After all, if the movie sucks, what's the worst thing that can happen? Nothing. I made a feature film. It was hard work, but I learned a ton about myself, and the film process. The positives far outweigh the negatives, no matter how you slice it. It's the best bet in this "odds are slim to none" career choice.

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The Atlanta Falcons got lucky. I hate them more than the Cowboys now. You would have thought they won the Super Bowl the way they were jumping around and gloating after the game. And the coach is the biggest buffoon in the game today. And I lost my fantasy game...so there!

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I tried to watch New York, New York, and I got to tell you, I am not into it at all. Firstly, it's a takeoff on those old musicals. Not a big fan. Secondly, It's over 2 1/2 hours long. Nope, can't do it. I watched 45 minutes, then it dawned on me-these characters and the dialogue could be straight from a 50's gangster movie. Which would have been cool, except that it's not. I understand what Scorsese was attempting- lets put these hard core, slimy characters in a sweet, sincere looking musical, and lets see what happens. The answer, unfortunately, is nothing. I will watch the entire thing with the Scorsese commentary, which I think is fine in this situation, though previously, in my film geek obsessive ways, I would never watch a film for the first time with the commentary on. I think being a film geek means I should watch the film first. But you know what? I am in no mood to watch it otherwise, so this is the best I can do. Okay?...Okay?! (Walks away, dejected and feeling embarrassed that I couldn't get through one of my idols films...I'm a hack...)

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Finally today, to answer all those anti-blogger blogs popping up in the ultimate irony, I will respond to two of their most frequent attacks.

#1-Bloggers are the ultimate narcissists, and are so self serving it is enough to make one ill.
Yes, I am a narcissist. Every writer is a self depreciating narcissist. It's not an enviable way to live, frankly. What a brilliant observation, though I find it funny that by blogging about their hatred for blogs, they are being the ultimate narcissists.

#2- Bloggers think every minute detail of their life is interesting, and therefore blather on about it to anyone who will read it, giving them the feel of importance.
Of course my life is interesting. Look at all my visitors! Yay for me! Wow, am I that transparent? Yes! And purposely so! It is a blog! Much like a diary, except for the public, so of course I think it's interesting, it's about me! I make no promise of enlightenment, or knowing where the golden ark resides(well, I do know, but...), but I do tell you what I think...it's not as if I'm selling a product. I am just venting, in a way. What's the harm?

Now, That's No Update!

2005-09-12T14:06:00.000-04:00

I haven't been posting much, obviously. I have football season on my mind, plus that Producer supposedly wants to have a sit down..(do people really use Mafia terminology now?). I have no idea what they really want, but, as I said, they appear to be truthful in who they are. But still...

I'm going to send out AFD2 in a last ditch effort to get any information for myself. The main problem, as I see it is not knowing if Mancuso has already received it. But fuck it, I'm sending it anyway.

Generator storyboards are about 1/3 finished. I get so frustrated with my hideous drawing skills. I know I can resort to stick figures, since they're for personal use anyway, but for some reason, I'm taking it as a challenge, so I get way to detailed, then my stomach churns when I see I can't do it. Hence the length of time it's taken for only 1/3. I have to just suck it up and admit, I cannot draw a picture. There, I said it. Hopefully, I can get past this 'wanting to be the best at everything even to myself' mentality that seems to be prevalent with everything I do. Which leads us into...

(If you have no interest in the NFL, or fantasy football, skip the next paragraph as it will seem even more geeky than it really is)

Fantasy football. I picked Javon Walker of the Packers as my number one wide receiver. He tore his knee up yesterday, in the first game of the year. He's done. Now this is two seasons a great player of mine has been injured on opening day. So I'm scrambling to make a deal, but the owners all know this, and of course try to rip me off in my desperation. So fuck 'em. I'm not dealing anyone. Meanwhile, I need Dunn of Atlanta to outscore Westbrook of Philly tonight. Even though I'm an Eagles fan. Great, isn't it? Here's hoping the scenario plays like this: Dunn has a great game, but Mcnabb of Philly carries the Eagles on his back and they win rather handily. Westbrook has a good game, but he doesn't touch the ball enough to do real damage. Yeah, like that will happen.

(End football talk)

I have the Martin Scorsese collection on DVD, the one with Raging Bull. It also includes New York, New York. It's the only Scorsese film I have yet to see, and I'm almost afraid to since everyone says it's his only misfire. I don't want that to taint my favorite Director. I'll let you know what I think as I watch it tonight after my Eagles whip up on Atlanta...again.

It's Coming- 02/01/2006

2005-09-10T00:22:00.000-04:00